


Sundown

by Geonn



Category: Original Work
Genre: Age Difference, Cheating, Crushes, Domestic Violence, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, First Time, Infidelity, Masturbation, Older Woman/Younger Woman, Photography, Secret Relationship, Strap-Ons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-28
Updated: 2013-04-29
Packaged: 2017-12-09 20:35:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/777727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geonn/pseuds/Geonn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A crime-scene photographer and a housewife meet in a photography class and can't deny their instant attraction to one another. Once they give in to their passions, it isn't long before they're faced with the very real danger of their secret coming to light.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [scribblenubbin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/scribblenubbin/gifts).



> Later chapters will include violence, both domestic and not, and a non-graphic scene of spousal rape. Reader discretion is advised.

"I can see her lyin' back in her satin dress, in a room where you do what you don't confess." Eva Alvarez moved her hips to the beat of the song, using the metal tongs to move the photograph through the developing fluid. She was barefoot and in jeans, her hair held back by a white band. The sleeves of her dress blouse were rolled up past her elbows so nothing would splash on them. 

She knew the other techs laughed at her for taking the class, claiming it was like a chef taking a remedial cooking course, but there work was work. It was cold and methodical. This was art. This was finding beauty in the world and recording it for future generations. And this was more than just pressing a button and saving a bunch of pixels to a card. This took time and effort and dedication to make the picture turn out just right.

The picture was starting to appear like magic, and she bent forward to take a closer look. It was a candid shot through the open window of her truck, taken moments after she'd shouted out Kathryn's name. It was framed perfectly, showing Kathryn from the top of her head to just below her knees. She was caught mid-step, half-turned toward the camera to see who was calling her. Wind had caught her dark hair and tossed it across her face, her left hand gripping the strap of her leather satchel.

"Getting lost in her loving is your first mistake," Gordon sang. 

"You got that right," Eva whispered wistfully. She let the picture finish the process so the colors would be just right, then she lifted it from the pan. She pinned it to the string running along the length of her darkroom and stared at it before she examined the other shots in the series. Kathryn was a decade older than her, elegant even in her J.C. Penney blouses and skirts, often showing up in jeans that were so worn that they seemed molded to the form of her body.

And what a form it was. Eva moved down the row and examined Kathryn in various states. Walking, sitting, staring out the window. There was a shot of her at one of the light tables in their classroom, bent forward from the waist to look at one of her photographs through an eyepiece. The shots of Kathryn's face ran the gamut of emotions, from surprise to amused irritation to shyly averted eyes. 

She stopped in front of a photo where Kathryn was looking away, her features framed by the fingers of her extended hand. Eva remembered the conversation that followed the snap.

_"I wish you wouldn't do that."_

_Eva lowered the camera. "I didn't think you minded."_

_"It makes me feel self-conscious. Like I always have to be aware of myself."_

_"You don't have to worry about that. You're always photogenic."_

_Kathryn looked at her. "You're sweet. But I'm no model. If anyone in our class should be posing, it would be you. You're young, you're beautiful." She looked away again. "I don't know why you're wasting your film on an old, married has-been."_

_"You don't think that. Do you? Kathryn, you're the most elegant, beautiful woman I've ever seen. I keep taking your picture because I just can't stop looking at you." She reached out and tucked a curl of hair behind Kathryn's ear. Kathryn tensed, but didn't pull away. Eva took advantage of the tacit permission and let the backs of her fingers brush Kathryn's neck. Kathryn closed her eyes and shivered._

_"Well," she said softly. "It's your film to waste, I guess."_

_"I'll try be less paparazzi about it. I don't want to make you self-conscious."_

Now there were photos of Kathryn pursing her lips to the camera, shyly ducking her head as she walked into the classroom with her arms tightly crossed over her chest. And then there was what she called Exhibit A. She took it down off the string and moved closer to the light so she could see it better. The picture never failed to make her mad, even though she'd never heard the conversation occurring when she had snapped it.

Kathryn was standing on the driver's side of her husband's truck, arms crossed over her chest, eyes cast toward her shoes. He was behind the wheel, his arm extended out the window so that his hand was resting on her shoulder. The grip seemed tight, and there was a tension in Kathryn's expression that had made Eva want to run across the parking lot and break the man's arm. Then break his fingers. Then his teeth.

Kathryn had looked up a moment later and saw Eva watching. She'd stepped away from her husband's grip, adjusted the sweater where his fingers had pulled it down to expose her shoulder, and she said something with venom before she turned and stalked away. Her husband had sighed and shook his head as he squealed the tires pulling away from the curb.

_"Kathryn? Wait..."_

_"Leave me alone, Eva. Please." She hadn't even turned around, moving quickly toward the restrooms at the end of the hall. She slapped her palm against the swinging door, pushing it open with her forward momentum, and she disappeared inside. Eva debated following her but decided she needed to be alone. She tapped her fingers against the shell of her camera and went into the classroom._

_Kathryn had missed that class._

Kathryn returned at the next class two days later as if nothing happened. Eva tried to get information out of her with a few pointed questions, but Kathryn shut her down every time. Finally Eva had given up and moved on. After class, she found Kathryn sitting on one of the benches outside the community center. She had walked over and, after a moment, sat next to her.

_"Do you need a ride?"_

_"Joseph is coming. He's on his way." She looked at her watch and almost whispered, "Should be on his way..."_

_"Do you want me to wait with you?"_

_"No. I mean, wait. Stay." She laughed and shook her head. "I thought you asked if I'd mind if you waited. And I don't. Mind, that is. Stay."_

_Eva smiled. "Okay."_

_They sat next to each other in silence. Kathryn looked at Eva's portfolio and smiled. "Are there any of me in there?"_

_"A few. Do you want to see them?"_

_"No. God. I can't believe you carry the hideous things around."_

_Eva's good humor failed her. "Don't say that about yourself." She sat the portfolio on her lap and opened it, flicking through the pictures until she found one. She slipped it out and handed it to Kathryn. "Look."_

_Kathryn glanced over, then gave it a closer look. It was a picture of her standing next to a tree and looking out over a duck pond, eyes squinted against the sun, the camera around her neck held up to chin-height in anticipation of snapping a picture. Her hair was back in a ponytail, and she wore a blue turtleneck that seemed to cushion her head. The blue of the turtleneck, the sky, and the water gave it a crisp, cool snap._

_"You're so talented."_

_"I had good inspiration."_

_Kathryn looked up and met Eva's eyes. Eva felt like she should look away, but she couldn't bring herself to._

_"You always look good in blue," Eva continued. "It brings out your eyes. You have such beautiful eyes."_

_"Eva..."_

_"Take it. Next time you wonder why I'm always taking pictures of you, take that out. Look at it. I want you to understand why I can't stop looking at you."_

_Kathryn was quiet for a long moment and then finally whispered, "Thank you, Eva."_

_"My pleasure."_

_The moment was shattered by a honking horn. Eva jumped, and Kathryn quickly but carefully pushed the photo into her own bag. Her husband's truck pulled up in front of them and she stood up, hurrying through the headlight beams to get into the passenger side. The truck lurched forward as soon as she was inside, forcing the door shut. Kathryn hadn't even had time to fasten her seatbelt._

_Eva watched the truck swing back around, speeding out of the parking lot. Terrible images of car accidents passed through her mind, of shattered windshields and bodies sprawled on the pavement, and her anger brewed. She forced herself to take ten long, slow breaths and then calmly closed her portfolio, stood, and walked to her truck._

She turned off the radio before she left the darkroom. It was set up in her second bedroom, separated from the master bedroom by the bathroom and a linen closet. She went through the house turning off lights and starting the dishwasher before she went to bed. She undressed and changed into an oversized T-shirt, crawled under the blankets, and opened the nightstand.

This was a photograph that she'd never show to Kathryn, a picture she would never actually admit she'd ever taken. They'd been at the park to take nature photos - their assignment that week - and Kathryn had wandered up a hill to see what the other side of the park had to offer. She was wearing a lightweight white sheath dress that stopped just above her ankles, something nice and conservative.

Unless, of course, she happened to be standing in direct sunlight. The sun was setting, casting beams like spotlights across the park to hit Kathryn at just the right angle to show off everything. Eva had turned and was treated to the outline of Kathryn's whole body, the silhouette dark against the creamy material. She'd brought her camera up without thinking and snapped the picture, then exposed the film until the dress was flimsy as a shadow. The final product appeared to be Kathryn posing nearly nude on a hill in a public park, a thin strip of white over her hips to indicate she was, indeed, wearing panties.

Eva moved a hand between her legs as she looked at the picture, feeling shame even as she began to massage her mound with the heel of her hand. She sucked in a ragged breath and closed her eyes, imagining what it would be like to really stand before a naked Kathryn. She touched her tongue to the corner of her mouth and pictured herself kneeling to slide the panties down, leaning forward to bury her face in the warmth, the wetness. 

"Kathryn, I want you," she whispered. 

She arched her back, bending her knees to tent the blankets as she bumped her butt against the mattress, thrusting against her hand, imagining it was Kathryn's. When she finished, thighs clamped tightly around her hand, she opened her eyes and looked at the picture again. She didn't know how anyone could look at this beautiful, sad woman and not want to do everything in their power to make her happy. She knew that if she was given the chance, she wouldn't squander it. She would make sure Kathryn knew she was treasured, every single day.

Eva put the photo back in the drawer and turned off the bedside lamp.

#

Kathryn finished washing the dishes. She did them by hand because Joseph didn't like the "ruckus" the dishwasher made. Beyond the wrinkled fingers she didn't really mind. She found it relaxing at the end of the day, washing the grime from the plates and silverware and then setting them aside to dry. She had an iPod dock next to the sink that she played quietly so it wouldn't disturb whatever game Joseph was watching in the main room. Usually she played classical music or indie music when she did chores, but the other day she'd noticed Eva humming a song. She'd asked what it was, looked up the singer, and she was currently listening to whatever she could find for free on the internet. Gordon Lightfoot, a Canadian singer with a mournful voice, sang about a man warning his wife's lover to stay away. The wife sounded like a temptress, and the narrator of the song seemed to understand it wasn't the other man's fault. 

Kathryn knew how it felt to be enraptured, to be helpless in the face of attraction. "Sundown, you better take care, if I find you've been creepin' 'round my backstairs."

She shook her head emphatically as if trying to clear smoke. No. She didn't know what it was like to be tempted. Because that would mean she was tempted, which she most certainly was not. Not by a woman, not by Eva Alvarez.

She drained the sink and dried her hands on the towel. When she went into the living room, Joseph was asleep in his chair. She sat in her own chair across the room and read for a while, ignoring the television knowing that Joseph would wake up and harangue her if she dared to change the channel. She wasn't passive, and she wasn't a pushover, she just knew to choose her battles. ESPN was easy enough to ignore, and her book was very engrossing.

Kathryn had once read Harlequin novels almost exclusively, but soon she became bored with the formula. Women, no matter how independent, seemed to all subconsciously want some man to swoop in and rescue them. Even if she didn't want the "hero" at first, she usually ended up in his bed before too long. Kathryn read too many novels where the first "love" scene involved the man doing whatever he wanted on a "you'll learn to like it" basis for the woman. Kathryn didn't want that, even in a fantasy. She wanted to _know_ what she wanted, without a doubt, and then take it. Or let it take her.

She rested her hand on her neck and let her fingers drift down her collar as she read. The woman in her novel was dark-haired and dark-eyed, with ruby red lips and a full figure that she took full advantage of. She dressed to tease, a slit in her dress to show her thigh or an extra button undone to show a hint of lacy brassiere. Kathryn realized in Chapter Two that she was picturing Eva in the role, and now in Chapter Ten the saucy character was getting a sex scene.

_She pressed her shoulders against the wall, angling her hips forward in anticipation. His hand disappeared under her skirt and came back with her panties hooked over his thumb. Melissa watched his face as she stepped out of them, and he straightened so he could look into her eyes as he pressed against her. She could feel him against her hip_

Kathryn wet her lips and stroked the V made by the collar of her blouse.

_and turned her hand around to cup him. Her eyes were dark with lust as she traced the length of his manhood and then moved her fingers to the zip. She freed him, taking him into her hand with a gasp of surprise._

Kathryn glanced at Joseph to see if he was still asleep. She raised her hand to her lips and pressed her thumb against her teeth, the book laid flat against her thigh as she spread the fingers of her free hand over the pages to hold it open. She skimmed the rest of the scene, knowing her cheeks were red as she skimmed over mentions of penetration and thrusting, of Ev-- Melissa grasping the back of his head as she moved against him. She could almost hear them grunting, could feel the heat coming off their bodies.

She replaced her bookmark with a trembling hand, put it on the arm of the chair, and walked to the bedroom as casually as she could. She shut the door quietly and stood next to the bed to take off her pants and underwear. She shrugged out of her blouse and placed it in the hamper, determined not to hurry like some wanton teenager. She put on her nightgown, a sleeveless cotton thing with an embroidered window across the cleavage.

She sat on the edge of the bed and opened the bottom drawer of her nightstand. The small egg-shaped vibrator fit her palm perfectly, and she switched it on as she swung her legs up and draped the blankets over her lower body. Slipping her other hand under the pillow, Kathryn closed her eyes and tugged up her gown. She gasped when the trembling toy touched her sex, and she bit her bottom lip to keep quiet as she rolled her wrist in slow circles.

Her favorite fantasy was The Masseuse. After a day at the spa, swimming laps in the pool, relaxing in the sauna, getting mani-pedis, the whole works, she was stretched out on a table for a long, slow massage. She imagined herself there, facedown and naked except for a towel across her butt, her cheek resting on her hands as she waited for the masseur to arrive. She imagined his hands on her shoulders, carefully kneading away the knots of tension she'd built up over the last three years. Soothing the strain she had from cringing every time Joseph got into one of his tantrums.

As if thinking his name had summoned him, Joseph came into the room. "You already in bed?"

She shut off the toy so he wouldn't hear it buzzing. "I had a long day."

"You think you had a long day," he muttered as he undressed on his side of the bed. "I hate to see you after a _real_ hard day, days like I have to suffer through."

"I know," Kathryn said.

The bed sagged as he joined her under the blankets. He pressed against her from behind, and she moved the vibrator to the mattress. It rolled and rested against her stomach as he guided himself between her legs. There was no discussion, no foreplay, and she closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the pillow as he was suddenly inside her. He sighed blissfully and splayed his fingers on her hip as he began to push against her.

Kathryn closed her eyes and bit her lip, hugging the pillow as she moved against him in an effort to get it over with. She focused on her fantasy, rebuilding the massage room. She smelled the oil, felt the smooth sheet underneath her naked body. She could almost hear the calming music piped through the ceiling as her ghostly masseur continued his work.

His hands moved down her back following her spine, carefully working each muscle individually until Kathryn felt like they weren't connected to her. They were just pieces, and she was adrift. And then she imagined the hands lingering over the towel. Then one touched the dimples just above her ass, and a soft voice asked, "May I remove this?"

The voice was Eva's.

Kathryn whimpered and bit her lip. Joseph pressed his lips against her ear. "You like that, huh?"

"Yes," she gasped.

Her response was to the fantasy masseur, now a masseuse, now _Eva_ , and the towel was removed. Slender fingers, a hand different from the one that had been massaging her, pushed between her legs and covered her mound. Two fingers stroked her, and Kathryn began moving her hips faster. In her mind it wasn't her husband thrusting into her, it was a hand. A fine-boned hand, two fingers twisted together, and she imagined Eva's hand on her shoulder to hold her down as she lifted her ass to give her lover ( _Eva_ ) a better angle. 

Now she could see it all clearly. Eva, her hair pinned up at either side, wearing a white polo shirt and short, tight shorts. She continued massaging Kathryn's shoulder with one hand while the other thrust harder, faster between her thighs.

"Hold my shoulder," Kathryn gasped.

Joseph put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed roughly. 

"Softer... please."

He complied, and Kathryn brought one hand up to her mouth. She bit the finger and whimpered. Her face was burning as she imagined that Eva was the one fucking her, as her mind told her it was Eva whose fingers were digging into her shoulder. She touched her tongue to her upper lip as she came, and Joseph pulled out to finish himself on her thigh even though it was impossible for her to have children.

She took the indignity of having his come on her skin, barely noticing as he rolled away from her with a satisfied grunt. When she could move without trembling, she used the tail of her gown to wipe his mess away, cupped the egg in her hand so he wouldn't see it, and walked to the bathroom on the balls of her feet. She closed the door and put down the toilet lid, spreading her legs and replacing the egg on her sex. She closed her eyes as she switched it back on, inhaling sharply as it vibrated against sensitive flesh.

She imagined Eva's smell, her touch, and pointed her toes to the ground, baring her teeth as she got herself off. She brought her free hand to her mouth to cover her moans even though she knew that Joseph was most likely fast asleep. She turned off the egg and let it rest between her legs and moved her fingers to cup herself. The whole hand was numb from clutching the vibrating toy and, for a blissful moment, she allowed herself to believe it was Eva's hand. She believed it was Eva's slender finger pushing into her, and her thumb circling her clit.

Kathryn bit the meaty part of her hand hard enough to leave teeth marks as she bucked against her hand, coming so hard that there were tears in the corners of her eyes when she finally sagged against the wall next to the toilet. She continued stroking herself, gasping as she rode the crest of her first orgasm to a second.

"Eva, Eva, Eva," she whispered.

She'd never had a woman touch her sexually, never even kissed another woman other than as a friend, but she wanted to come for Eva. She wanted to reward all those glances, all those searing stares. She loved the way Eva looked at her. She fought it, she complained, but only because she thought she should, but she'd be heartbroken if Eva ever stopped. To look up, to catch a beautiful woman caught in a helpless stare, to know that she was being admired... she wanted to reward the feeling she got from those interludes.

She wanted to make Eva come.

She whimpered at the thought, but it was true. She couldn't deny it, and she came again as she thought about how it would happen. Her heart pounded, her cheek against the cool tile of the wall, eyes closed as she cupped a hand over her sensitive sex and closed her thighs around it. She swallowed hard and tugged her nightgown back to her knees, standing on untrustworthy knees to examine her face in the mirror.

_"You're wasting film."_

_Eva smiled and lowered the camera. "It's my film. What do you care?"_

_Kathryn blushed and reached up to finger-comb her hair so that it fell across her face. Eva reached out and immediately pushed it away, tucking it behind Kathryn's ear. Her middle finger brushed Kathryn's neck when she pulled it away, and Kathryn tensed as a shock passed between them._

_"Sorry. This stupid carpeting in here..."_

_"Right." Kathryn looked up. "Do you really think I'm beautiful?"_

_"I know you are." She snapped another picture. "And you have to believe me. I'm a professional photographer."_

_Kathryn chuckled. "You take pictures of dead bodies. I'm not sure if I'm particularly touched by your professional opinion."_

_"I take pictures of crime scenes. That's a different thing all together. Sometimes there are bodies. Or body parts."_

_"Topic change, please."_

_"Sorry. Yes." She stepped in front of Kathryn where there was nowhere to hide and snapped a picture. "I think you're very beautiful, Kathryn. Gorgeous, in fact. I can't take my eyes off you."_

_They stared at each other for a long moment until Kathryn looked away._

_"Does your husband ever tell you--"_

_"Shit. Joseph." She stood up, nearly knocking her satchel off the desk. She corrected it before anything could spill, moving in jerky twitches as she grabbed her things and headed for the door. "He was going to be early picking me up. I have to go."_

_"If you missed him, I can give you a ride."_

_"No, it's... no. Thank you. No." She waved over her shoulder and ran from the classroom. She had missed him, spotting the taillights of his truck as they disappeared down a side street. She stopped her foot on the sidewalk, looked helplessly around the parking lot, and then began the long two-and-a-half mile walk home._

_She took the long way so Eva wouldn't spot her and offer her a ride home._

She looked at the forty-six year old woman in the mirror, mentally projecting an image of Eva next to her. She had crows-feet, she had lines near her lips. There were traces of white in her hair. She kept in shape, and several people at the gym had told her she had a body they'd have killed for in their thirties, but she still thought it was the body of an old woman. And Eva definitely had the body of a younger woman. Firm breasts, flawless milky skin... 

_I wonder how it feels..._

She cursed softly and rested her hands on the sink, lowering her head and closing her eyes. The class was only seven weeks. She could make it through the last half without going crazy, she knew she could. She had fought off temptations in the past. The fact the source was female this time would make it easier. She didn't want to be with a woman. She didn't want that label of "lesbian." Of course it hadn't hurt Meredith Baxter any...

"No," she said to her reflection. " _No._ "

She retrieved her vibrator, shut off the bathroom light, and went back to her husband's bed. She was under the blankets before she felt where her nightgown had been soiled. She didn't want to bother getting up to change it, so she just folded the material so it wasn't touching her skin and tried to remember not to toss and turn too much in the night.


	2. Chapter 2

Kathryn and Eva sat apart at their next class, not out of design but simply because of how they happened to drift in. Kathryn glanced over a few times as the teacher spoke, and Eva only caught her twice. She smiled and lifted her hand in a wave, and Kathryn could barely stop thinking about the length and shape of her fingers, the rings on her pinkie and thumb... would she take those off before... b-before... She turned to look straight ahead, focusing on their assignment.

"...comfort zones. If you prefer to take pictures of nature, then find a building to photograph. If your portfolio is full of children, take a picture of a senior citizen. Photography is the art of seizing a moment, not simply chronicling the things you like looking at. If you can find beauty outside of your main focus, you can find beauty anywhere. So take a leap, look further and look forward. I want to see five photographs by next week's class."

When he dismissed them to either leave or use the class resources, Kathryn moved to the light table where Eva was seated. 

"Comfort zone? What does that even mean?"

Eva smiled. "It means doing something you wouldn't normally do. Hi."

"Hi." She settled on the stool across from Eva, feeling ashamed for what she had done the night before and certain Eva could somehow tell. "That makes me uncomfortable. Which is the point, I suppose." She scratched her neck. "What are you going to do?"

"Well, I hate taking shots of things in motion. I can't work with the blur. So I'm going to find something that's moving and do my worst."

"Your worst is better than most people's best."

Eva smiled and nodded her chin at Kathryn's portfolio. "How about you? What's your comfort line?"

"I honestly have no idea." She picked up her camera and turned it so she could see her inverted reflection in the glass.

Eva started to say something, then tilted her head to the side. "You know... I've seen your portfolio, so I could make a suggestion. I don't want you to think I'm criticizing you, though. I think you're already an amazing photographer. I know you're going to finish this class in the top three, but there is something you avoid."

Kathryn nodded eagerly. "Please! I'll take any advice you might have."

"It's..." She wrinkled her nose, pursing her lips as she thought of a polite way to say what she was thinking. "Sexuality. You take pictures of things and of people, and they're beautiful, but you stop just sort of any kind of sensual element. I think you could make some truly great, tastefully erotic artwork."

"Erotic?" Kathryn whispered it like a dirty word. She shook her head and then shrugged. "Well, it is outside my comfort zone, I guess. But where would I even find a model? I don't know any porn stars."

"You could always self-pose."

"Eva." She blushed and shook her head.

"Then I could pose for you."

Kathryn tried not to look too intrigued by that idea. Even if she completely botched the pictures, simply having Eva in them would make them erotic. She wet her bottom lip as she considered it, unconsciously running her thumbs over the sides of the camera. She swallowed down the lump in her throat.

"It's only fair, after all the pictures I've taken of you."

"True," Kathryn said with a laugh. "Okay. Maybe. If I don't think of something else."

Eva smiled. "Great."

"And I could help you with your motion shots."

"Thank you. I was going to ask, but I didn't want to impose. I know you don't exactly like me taking your picture."

"It's not... I..." She shifted on the stool. "I like it fine. I just feel like I have to complain."

"Why?"

"Because if I just let you do it, I'd be admitted I'm worth photographing. And that feeling is alien to me. Most days I don't even feel pretty, let alone photo-worthy."

Eva considered her for a moment. "Maybe that should be your comfort-zone project. Self-portraiture. Maybe it would force you to see yourself the way other people see you. The way I see you."

"Are you gay?"

Eva blinked, and Kathryn covered her mouth.

"I'm so sorry. Don't answer that, please, I didn't mean--"

"No. It's fine." She hunched her shoulders and clasped her hands together on top of the desk. "I am gay. Is that a problem?"

"No. It makes it better, for some reason. You're not just a woman saying another woman is pretty on an objective scale. You... might actually be attracted to me."

Eva let the moment hang and then slowly nodded. "I might be."

Kathryn met her eyes and didn't look away. Finally she pressed her lips together and looked at her camera. "I'm free on Saturday. Joseph, um, watches sports all day. I doubt he'd even notice if I was gone. Shall we do our projects then?"

"Works for me. Do you want to come over to my place?"

"I don't know where it is."

"I'll give you directions. Say around noon?"

Kathryn nodded. "Noon works."

"It's a date," Eva said.

Kathryn tried not to look too startled at her choice of words and nodded. After the collaboration was decided, they spent the rest of the class period going over Eva's shots from the previous week. Kathryn was embarrassed and touched in equal measure at how many of the pictures featured her. She watched Eva as Eva examined the pictures and pointed out things she could have framed differently, and she suddenly understood what it was like to be wanted. To be admired and desired. 

It felt alien... and damn good.

#

Eva tried on and discarded three outfits on Friday night, eventually standing before her closet in a towel as she examined everything she owned. She took down a skirt only to immediately decide it wasn't right. She ran her fingers down one long purple sleeve, then gripped a black one and pulled it out to remind herself what the whole thing looked like. No, wrong. She let it fall back into place and laced her fingers on the back of her head, elbows extended to either side. 

Her indecision came from the duality of what she was preparing for. It wasn't a date, but it was an afternoon with Kathryn. Seduction wasn't on the table, but the purpose of their get-together was so Kathryn could explore sensuality in her art. Well, what was more sensual than nudity? She felt an exhibitionist thrill as she considered that. Kathryn would never go for it. Would she...? 

Eva ran her fingers down the length of a blue dress and considered. She turned away from the clothes and opened a drawer. Maybe not strict, total nudity. But lingerie, boudoir-photography. Panties and a garter belt, a shawl wrapped around her arms to cover her breasts... Nothing like what you'd find in _Playboy_ but erotic. Undeniably sexual. She picked up a pair of lace panties and rubbed the material between thumb and forefinger.

She grinned and began looking for the right combination of lingerie so she wouldn't have to search if Kathryn agreed.

#

They met at noon and, considering the need for outdoor photography and the lighting necessity, decided they would work on Eva's motion pictures first. There was a park at the end of Eva's street and they walked their together, cameras hanging around their necks like they were tourists who had wandered off the main path. The park stretched for the length of three city blocks, with a walking trail and a playground for the kids. The playground was bordered by wooden railroad ties, a barrier that kept the safety cedar chips of the playground's surface from spilling out onto the soft green grass of the park.

Kathryn was dressed in black slacks and a white trenchcoat, her hair styled in waves and curls. Eva complimented her on the new look, and Kathryn had shrugged it off.

"I figure if I'm going to be an on-purpose model, I might as well look the part." She tossed her hair and preened, making Eva laugh. "Okay. Motion." She looked around and smiled as she took her camera off and handed it to Eva. "Hold this for me."

Eva slung the camera over her shoulder as Kathryn jogged onto the playground. She skipped over the railroad ties and went to the swings, placing herself in the seat and threading the chain around both arms. She used the toes of her boots - leather and pointed at the ends, definitely sexier than any other footwear Eva had ever seen her wear - to push herself back. She bent and extended her legs until she had a good rhythm going, and Eva moved closer to take the shot.

_The center of the shot is an upside-down V, the legs of a swing set as seen from the side. The person on the swing is nearly out of the shot, the back of her coat extending out behind her like a cape. Her face is barely seen in profile, smiling broadly with eyes closed as she takes the swing higher, her hands wrapped around the chains in a white-knuckle grip._

_A black-haired woman in a white trenchcoat is walking away from the camera, shoes in her hands, her bare feet cautiously balanced on a railroad tie. Green grass is to one side, red cedar chips to the other. Her arms are extended slightly at 45 degree angles, her head bowed to watch her feet in case she slips._

_The same dark-haired woman, her trenchcoat gone to reveal a simple navy-blue dress, stands slightly stooped, one hand up to hold back her hair as she laughs at the photographer. Around her feet are streaks of color, a few of them solid enough to identify the shape of running dogs passing just in front of the woman._

_Nothing in the picture is in focus. A dark-haired woman crouches on the edge of a merry-go-round that is in motion, her arms stretched out to either side in a death grip on the safety bars. Her body is canted to the left with the motion of the ride as she struggles to remain upright. Her features are a blur, as is everything else in the picture, but one can easily see that her mouth is open wide in a howl. Whether in terror or joy, it's impossible to tell._

Eva grabbed the safety bar and pulled, her feet skipping across the grass as she brought the merry-go-round to a stop. Kathryn stood shakily, tears still rolling down her cheeks and lips still spread wide in a smile as she swayed from side to side like a sailor trying to find her land-legs again. She looked dazed, drunk, and she took one step off the edge of the disc and stumbled. Eva leapt forward to close the distance between them, grabbing Kathryn before she could hit the ground and keeping her upright. 

"Whoa. Give it another second."

"Okay." Kathryn braced herself on Eva's shoulders and closed her eyes as everything in her head stopped swirling. She giggled helplessly, shaking her head as she tried to stop herself because she thought it made her sound like a cartoon chipmunk. "Sorry. Sorry, I haven't played on a playground like this since I was a kid. I forgot how messed-up it could make you."

"You need to throw up?"

"No. I think... No." She caught her breath and risked opening her eyes. She was still unsteady, but she could have stood without Eva's help. She could have, she knew it for a fact. So she didn't know why she wasn't. She didn't know why she was pressed against Eva's body, her hand dangerously close to the swell of Eva's breast, far too close to her face.

Eva pressed her lips together and averted her gaze. "This is uncomfortable."

"No... i-it's not, it's just--"

"No, this." She leaned back and moved the camera, which had been pressing into her right breast.

"Oh." She smiled nervously and released her. They stepped apart and Eva looked down at her camera. "Well... we have four in-motion photos. I think we can spend some time getting yours if you wanted to go back to my house."

Kathryn nodded, suddenly nervous about what exactly would constitute a "sensual" photo shoot in the privacy of Eva's house. They walked back down the street, pausing so they could take pictures of random items that didn't go toward their assignment but would still look good. 

"I don't know how I'll feel when the class ends," Eva said. "On the one hand, it'll be nice to be able to photograph whatever I want without worrying if it fits the assignment. On the other hand, the assignments help guide me. I don't want to fall into a rut."

"You're so talented," Kathryn said. "The end of the class will free you to do whatever you want. It's opened your eyes. Can't close them now."

Eva smiled. "I decided to take the class because I was sick of using my camera to record horrible events. You work as a crime-scene photographer, all your scrapbooks are suddenly filled with blood and guts and scenes of just horrible ugliness. Evidence that everyone is just a bastard. And then I walked into photography class, and I saw someone who was just... grace and beauty. After everything I was forced to take pictures of at work, is it any wonder I gravitated toward you?"

Kathryn absently rubbed her cheek. "You're going to make me blush."

"I seem to do that a lot."

"You do. But don't stop on my account."

Eva grinned and led Kathryn up the driveway of her house. They went in through the back door and Kathryn paused on the threshold to appreciate the décor. It was spartan but lived-in, with mail scattered on the coffee table and pillows tangled in an afghan on the couch. Eva went to the fridge and held the door open. 

"Do you want something to drink?"

"Water is fine. Your home is lovely."

"Thanks. I sort of inherited it from my grandmother. She moved into a retirement village, couldn't bear the thought of giving up her home. It's better than a studio apartment." She brought Kathryn a bottle of water and tapped her own against it in a mock toast before she unscrewed the cap and went into the living room. "I thought you could take the pictures in here. We could open up these picture windows for the natural lighting, and a few lamps over here--"

"No, I want the natural light only. I don't want it to look produced."

"Okay. I set this up last night, is this good?"

Kathryn stepped into the living room to see what she meant. A loveseat had obviously been moved from its usual place so that it was facing the couch, draped with deep-crimson scarves that would be see-through in the right lighting. Kathryn felt her ears burning as she looked at the clothes neatly stacked on the nearby ottoman, already imagining how good Eva would look in them. She nodded slowly and tried to work up some moisture in her mouth. 

"This is fine. Um. Which outfit do you want to start with?"

_A woman is seated on the very edge of the couch in a man's shirt and nothing else. Her hand is up near her mouth, fingers curled. Her legs bare, her sleeves rolled up to expose her forearms. Her dark hair is mussed as if from repeated finger-rakings, and her lips are slightly parted to show a hint of her teeth. She's looking toward the window as if looking to see if the person she's waiting for is coming yet._

_The curve of a shoulder, a sliver of a profile obscured by curls of black hair. The harsh light reveals imperfections - a freckle, a scar, the line where a bra strap indented the flesh - that make the subject seem more real. The arm is extended slightly and the hint of a curve of a breast is visible between it and the woman's body._

_The bush outside the window behind the woman frames her form, casting shadows that obscure the details of her face. Her arms are raised with her fingers resting lightly on her cheeks. Her arms are resting on bare breasts, covering them while leaving no doubt as to the fact she's not wearing a top. The waistband of her pants is visible just at the edge of the frame, showing she's not quite entirely nude._

Kathryn lowered the camera. She found that hiding behind the lens made it easier to accept Eva's increasing nudity. A glimpse of her panties here, the possible exposure of a nipple before she found the proper position of her arms to conceal herself. It was when she lowered the camera that the problems cropped up. She felt the sweat on her upper lip and licked it away, wishing the room was warmer so she could blame it on that.

"Something wrong?" Eva dropped her hands to the opposite shoulders, crossing her arms to keep her breasts covered. 

"No, not wrong. Just... um." She started to put down her camera, stopped, then put it down and stepped closer to where Eva was posing. "I got a little of your pants in the shot. I wanted this to look like Eve in the Garden, and..."

"Oh. You can adjust them if you want. I kind of have my hands full."

Kathryn smiled nervously. "Oh. Kay. Um." She put down her camera next to Eva and let her hands hover in thin air for a moment. Finally she hooked her fingers in the first two belt loops and held her breath as she tugged downward. Eva's entire body jerked with the motion, and Kathryn turned her head so she wouldn't see her breasts jiggle with the motion. She tugged again, but the pants seemed to be as low as they would go.

Eva looked over her shoulder out the window. "We're losing the light. If you want to get this shot, it's now or never..."

"It's not my fault your pants are so tight."

"I am wearing underwear," Eva pointed out, "if you just wanted to take the pants down altogether."

"I don't know about that."

"What's not to know?"

Kathryn straightened and looked into Eva's eyes. "I'm _married_."

"They're just pictures, Kathryn."

"No, they're not. You know they're not. Not when it's you. And not when it's me taking them." Her words came out in a rush, and she finally closed her eyes and ducked her chin. "Damn it, Eva. I'm married. I'm straight."

"Okay."

"Not okay." She put her hand on the back of Eva's head and stepped even closer, pressing Eva against the window just before their lips met. Kathryn squeezed her eyes shut, her brow furrowed as she put her hands on Eva's arms. It was the most passionate kiss she'd had in recent memory, a kiss that put all her other kisses to shame. She almost didn't remember how it went, but Eva guided her by gently probing her lips with the tip of her tongue. Kathryn held her breath as she let it in, curling her own tongue back and then touching it to Eva's. 

The contact was like breaking a wall, and Kathryn's grip on Eva tightened as she gave herself completely over to the kiss. Eva dropped her arms and wrapped them around Kathryn, who was suddenly very aware that Eva was topless in front of her. She squeezed her eyes tighter, not willing to see Eva's nudity until the time was right, until her mind finished fully processing the kiss. 

Eva's hands moved spider-like around Kathryn's hips, her fingers making forward progress by walking along the curves until they met in the small of her back. She found the zipper and followed it up, finally finding the pull and pinching it between her thumb and forefinger. She broke the kiss and leaned back, turning her head when Kathryn tried to recapture her lips. Kathryn settled for kissing Eva's cheek and moving toward her throat.

"You have to say it's okay, Kathryn."

"Please," Kathryn whispered against Eva's ear.

"You have to say it."

Kathryn breathed hard for a moment, almost panting, and then whimpered. "Eva. Take off my clothes."

Eva tugged down the zipper and Kathryn tensed, pressing against her, holding on tight as the material sagged. When it was down, Eva trailed her fingers up along the warm skin of Kathryn's bare back, mind reeling that she was actually touching it, and slipped her fingers under the straps. Kathryn leaned back and Eva pulled forward, and the dress came down to expose the black satin cups of Kathryn's bra.

Kathryn's eyes were closed, her lips parted and swollen from their kissing, and she hunched her shoulders to lift her arms up. Eva knelt in front of her, pulling the dress down, exposing the black half slip underneath. She let the dress fall to the floor and ran her hands over the outside of Kathryn's thighs as she leaned in to kiss her stomach, extending her tongue to tease Kathryn's navel as her hands roamed just under the hem of her slip.

"Oh, God."

Eva looked up. "You can tell me to stop at any time, Kathryn."

"I never want you to stop."

"Good. I was bluffing."

Kathryn exhaled sharply, a sound meant to be a laugh but lacking the energy. She threaded her fingers through Eva's hair and pulled her up. Eva stood, and they were kissing again. Eva kissed both of Kathryn's cheeks, her chin, the tip of her nose and her tightly-shut eyes and pushed her hands through her thick, dark hair.

"Look at me. Kathryn... look at me, please."

Kathryn's eyes opened and Eva felt weak. Beautiful and blue, bright and shining eyes that seemed almost alien. Eva wondered how anyone could look at this woman and not want to while away every minute photographing her. There shouldn't be a second lost to history. Kathryn returned the gaze and Eva thought maybe, possibly, Kathryn found her beautiful as well. 

When their lips met again it was less frenzied, less hectic, and Eva sagged against Kathryn's body. Kathryn turned her around and walked her to the couch they had been using as a prop. She sat her down and straightened, finally looking down at her naked chest. Her breasts were full, with dark nipples that were standing aroused as Eva teased them with her fingers and thumbs. 

"You were going to take off my pants."

Kathryn reached down and undid the button, pausing to rub the back of her hand over the downy, almost invisible hair on Eva's stomach just above the waistband of her pants. Eva lifted her hips and Kathryn dragged her pants down, kneeling to get them off her feet. She bowed her head and kissed both of Eva's knees. 

Eva chuckled. "No one's ever kissed my knees before."

"I don't know why. They're lovely." She tried to keep the tremor from her lips as she kissed Eva's thighs. She made it nearly halfway to her hip before she stopped and retreated. "I can't. I mean, I don't... know if I'm ready for that."

"It's okay." Eva sat up and leaned forward to cup Kathryn's face. "We don't have to do anything at all."

"I'm in my underwear. You're nearly naked."

"And that can be where it stops if you want." She touched two fingers to Kathryn's lips. "Say the word and I'll put my clothes back on."

That thought terrified her more than the idea of actually doing something sexual. She took Eva's fingers into her mouth, sucking gently as she moved her hands over Eva's thighs. Eva parted them, and Kathryn closed her eyes to blindly explore the material of Eva's panties. She traced the shape of Eva's labia, her jaw tight as she listened to Eva's sharp, nearly-silent gasps of pleasure. She rubbed her own thighs together as she explored, and Eva began to kiss her face.

"I want to see you naked, too," Eva whispered.

Kathryn shook at the lust in her voice and nodded her head. She slipped the panties aside and teased Eva with the knuckle of one bent finger. "This is how I touch myself."

Eva moaned. "Feels pretty good. Do you ever use two?"

Kathryn bit her bottom lip and added a second finger. Eva squirmed on the couch and whispered, "Yes," balling her hands into fists. "Kathryn, I've wanted this for so long."

"Please say my name again." She closed her eyes, hating how cliché she sounded, but she couldn't resist. "Please."

"Kathryn, Kathryn..."

She extended one finger inside, and Eva tensed. Kathryn lowered her head, wetting her thumb before she used it to find Eva's clit. She made a fist with her other hand and pressed it between her thighs, shifting her weight so that she was sitting on it. She bit her lip as she rubbed herself against her wrist, watching with half-lidded eyes as her fingers disappeared into Eva's body, her thumb rolling over the hard bud of Eva's clit. She wet her lips and bowed again, moving her thumb and kissed the small bud.

"Ha! Christ!" Eva cried out. "I'm coming..."

Kathryn's cheeks and ears were burning, but she kept moving her hand, rocking herself against her wrist, and she circled Eva's clit with her tongue, moaning as Eva clenched around her. She wanted her fingers to be crushed, wanted her hand to be trapped. She never wanted to pull out, but eventually Eva sagged back with a weary exhale, groaning as she brought her hand up to her forehead and tried to catch her breath. Kathryn eased her fingers free, causing Eva to gasp and twitch at the contact on sensitive flesh. She looked at her glistening fingers, evidence that she had indeed just made Eva Alvarez orgasm.

"Taste me."

Kathryn looked to see Eva watching her, then cautiously placed both fingers in her mouth. She closed her eyes, trying to concentrate on the taste but unable to compare it to anything. It tasted like... Eva. She sucked hard, caving in her cheeks as she brushed her tongue over the pads of both fingers and then between them. She licked her lips and then looked up to see Eva was watching her.

"You taste good."

Eva smiled. "I want to see you."

Kathryn resisted the encroaching shyness that she knew was threatening to overtake her, the part of her brain that would cry this was a bad idea. She stood up and curled her toes in the carpet as she reached back to unhook her bra. Eva, post-orgasmic and flush from the climax, lay sprawled beneath her as she dropped the underwear and resisted the urge to cover her breasts. She pushed down her half-slip, leaving her in panties and pantyhose. 

"Will you take them off?"

Eva sat up, her breasts moving hypnotically as she scooted to the edge of the couch.

"Wait..."

Kathryn picked up her camera and held it with one hand, pushing back Eva's hair. Eva looked up at her, and Kathryn snapped the shot.

_An off-center image, almost abstract until the object near the bottom right of the frame is identified as an eye. Then one sees a wave of dark hair behind held back to expose the side of a face beaded with sweat. The picture is black-and-white, but the eye is narrowed with anticipation, want, desire, and satisfaction. It is quite obviously the picture of a woman who has just been pleasured._

Eva peeled the nylons from Kathryn, who put the camera aside as she was exposed. Eva bent forward and kissed just above Kathryn's knee, then the center of her hip. She placed her hands on Kathryn's ass and squeezed before she centered herself. She rested her hands on Kathryn's body, thumbs extended to frame the dark triangle of hair between Kathryn's legs.

"I want you to taste me now," Kathryn whispered, looking down, her hair falling into her face. "Please, Eva."

Eva wet her lips, kissed Kathryn's pubic hair, and moaned. Kathryn closed her eyes and rolled her head back, one hand on top of Eva's head as if to help her keep balance. She bent her knees and rocked her hips forward, pressing herself against Eva's tongue. She'd never been gone down on, never had someone willingly pressing their tongue against her. Joseph would do it grudgingly, giving her a quick lick before pushing into her. 

But Eva... savored it. Eva treated it like the main attraction, and Kathryn felt lightheaded as her sex was fully explored for the first time. She felt sweat on her forehead and between her breasts, moving her hips so that Eva didn't have to do all the work. Eva slipped her hands back around and tightened on Kathryn's buttocks, guiding her thrusts. She closed her lips around Kathryn's clit and hummed.

The sun that had slowly been setting now hit the window at an oblique angle, sending a beam of bright golden light into Kathryn's face as deliberately as a flashlight. She felt its warmth as she came against Eva's tongue, climaxing silently with her mouth wide open and the sun reflecting in her eyes. It felt like a spiritual moment, as if something holy was absolving her from the sin of adultery. 

Her lover's tongue slid over her again and Kathryn cried out at the touch, hunching forward and drawing Eva's head away from her. Eva looked up and Kathryn bent down to kiss her. She tasted herself on Eva's tongue and sucked it in her mouth, intrigued by the sensation of her juices on another woman's mouth. Eva rose from the couch and pressed against Kathryn. She guided her onto the floor and settled her weight between her legs, one hand on the floor and the other on the side of Kathryn's head as she bent her knees on the carpet and began to thrust between Kathryn's legs.

"Now it's your turn."

At first Kathryn didn't understand, but then she closed her eyes. She worked her tongue to get moisture into her mouth and then gasped, "Eva. Eva, Eva, Eva."

She bent her knees, gripping Eva between them and lifting her lower body off the floor to meet each forward thrust, muscles in her thighs and lower back protesting as she twisted. She pressed the back of her head into the carpet and whispered a curse in disbelief as she was pushed to and then over the edge again. The orgasm hit her like a slap, her entire body clenching as it rocked her. She curled her toes and whispered Eva's name one more time, her fingers numb and crooked as she brought them to Eva's head and stroked her hair.

"No one's ever made me feel like that," Kathryn whispered. "Eva."

Eva kissed her eyelids. "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay. I'm okay."

"Good."

The room was appreciably darker now. The sun had gone behind a neighbor's tree, casting shadows where once had been blinding light. Kathryn pulled Eva down onto her knowing that she couldn't survive a third orgasm but unwilling to separate from her just yet. She was shaking as if she was cold, and she didn't protest when Eva drew one of the blankets off the couch and covered them both with it.

"Don't let me fall asleep. Eva... Eva, don't let me fall asleep."

But Eva was already asleep, and Kathryn reluctantly followed soon after.


	3. Chapter 3

Kathryn woke on the floor, legs tangled with Eva's. Her heart leapt, rattling in her chest when she realized where she was and what the darkness meant. She was late. She was with her mistress. She made no move to pull away, because Eva was sleeping right in front of her. Naked Eva, with dried sweat from their lovemaking sticky on her shoulder. Moving as little as possible, Kathryn looked down her friend's body. She was loosely draped by the blanket, which revealed her spine and the curve of her butt. 

For a moment she wished her camera was within reach, and that the light was better. But then she touched Eva's arm and watched the goosebumps erupt, and she was glad the camera was missing. Cameras preserved moments for the future, but Kathryn wanted to keep this one right here, trapped in the ether of her memory. This moment was just for her. 

She leaned in and kissed the back of Eva's neck before snuggling against her again. Spooned on the floor of Eva's living room, knowing full well that she was already late and facing an unpredictable retribution, she closed her eyes and let herself fall back to sleep.

#

Kathryn was momentarily confused when she opened her eyes. Not about where she was or what she had done; that was still firmly in her mind thanks to Eva's scent all around her, the hard floor under her back, and the soreness between her legs that was the result of multiple orgasms. She was still naked on the floor of Eva's living room, with Eva curled naked against her. Her confusion came from waking out of a deep and restful slumber. She hadn't gotten up to pee, she hadn't woken at three in the morning to toss and turn for an hour. She had simply slept. And considering the fact they had fallen asleep at sunset... 

She searched for a clock she could read without moving and finally found one on the wall above the kitchen doorway. Four-thirty, which meant they had slept for ten hours. She'd never slept for ten solid hours, not even as a teenager. She looked down at the woman who had prompted maybe the first truly restful slumber of her life and felt a surge of emotion in her chest. Eva was absolutely gorgeous in repose, eyelids fluttering ever-so-slightly and lips parted just enough to see her teeth. The tension was gone from her face, revealing the true extent of her beauty.

Kathryn brushed her thumb over Eva's cheek, and Eva's face shifted. She blinked slowly, opened her eyes to see her face was pillowed by Kathryn's chest, and then pushed back just enough that they could look into each other's faces.

"It happened."

Kathryn nodded. "Are you upset?"

"I'd only be upset if I woke up and found out it was a dream again."

"Again?"

Eva smiled. "Yeah."

"You dream about me?"

"A lot."

They kissed, and Kathryn traced the shell of Eva's ear with her thumb. Eva pecked the corners of Kathryn's mouth.

"Are you upset?" Eva asked. "Considering--"

Kathryn used her left thumb to stroke the ring on the third finger. She considered the question for a long moment, knowing Eva wanted a sincere answer rather than the knee-jerk response. Finally she wet her lips.

"My husband hates me."

Eva's shock was apparent. "That's... he couldn't."

"He does. I don't blame him." She looked down and laced the fingers of her right hand with Eva's. "We met in high school. He was a baseball phenom, definitely going places. College, the major league... He had his pick of girls, and I wanted to be one of them so badly. He was pristine and beautiful and I wanted him to want me. And one night he chose me. We fooled around a couple of times, and then halfway through senior year... I missed my period. We panicked, of course, and finally he decided to do the right thing. We got a GED, we got married, he decided against college and got a job working at a supermarket to support me and the baby.

"Then I miscarried on our second-month anniversary. It was only four months after I saw the plus-sign in the test, but it was enough time to completely derail him. He'd dropped out, and the big colleges had moved on to other prospects. He'd have to wait a year before they'd even consider signing him up, and by then he'd be so out of practice that it would just be a mockery."

Eva's brow was furrowed. "He still could have just left you if he blamed you."

Kathryn smiled sadly. "I offered to leave him, but he refused. He wasn't the golden boy anymore. No prospects. Eighteen and married. Baseball had shut the door on him, and women weren't exactly lining up at his door anymore. Suddenly I was the best he could hope for, so he wasn't about to let me go. The first couple of years we tried to get pregnant again, but it never worked. Eventually I got a check-up and the doc... the doctor said it wasn't going to happen. I'd never carry a baby to term."

Eva touched Kathryn's cheek.

"He gave up his entire life for a baby that never appeared. There was evidence, I mean, I'd started to show and there were doctor visits and... h-he knew I hadn't just made it up to trap him. But he still felt trapped. I couldn't blame him. It was my fault his life had been ruined. I have to stay, to make amends."

"Forever? You have to throw away your life and your wants just because you made a mistake a long time ago. You can't still be living in the shadow of that miscarriage."

Kathryn shook her head. "No. But we've been together so long that new resentments and new obligations have built themselves on that foundation. It's a brick wall, and it's all around us. We can't get free even if we wanted to. We're stuck with each other." She kissed Eva between the eyes and then lowered to kiss her lips. "Thank you for giving me a window, though."

"Of course."

"Will you make love to me again?"

"Yes," Eva whispered. She moved her hand down Kathryn's body. Kathryn closed her eyes at the gentle touch, goosebumps rising in the wake of her finger until two fingers extended over her labia and began to stroke. Kathryn put her arms around Eva's shoulders and rocked against her, grunting quietly as Eva pushed inside of her. Eva tilted her head and pressed her lips to Kathryn's throat, feeling her heartbeat against her lips.

Kathryn raked her fingers along Eva's shoulder when she came, gasping and baring her teeth as she tightened around Eva's fingers.

"I've never come so many times in a single night. Maybe in my entire life to date."

Eva stroked her hair out of her face. "That's so sad. I'll have to make up for lost time." Her face changed as a thought dawned on her. "If... this happens again, I mean. Kathryn, if you want this to just be a one-time thing, I can deal with--"

" _No._ " Kathryn sat up and threw her leg over Eva's, straddling her as she covered Eva's body with her own. "Please. No. Please tell me we'll do this again."

"Your husband..."

Kathryn shook her head. "That's my problem. Please, Eva, I have to hear you say it."

Eva watched Kathryn for signs that she was wavering, but she saw nothing. She rolled onto her back, Kathryn's sex warm against her belly. She took Kathryn's hands in her own and brought them to her lips to kiss each finger individually, then looked up into her eyes.

"We'll do this again."

Kathryn let loose the breath she'd been holding and closed her eyes. "Thank you." She let the moment linger, and then shifted her weight. "I think I owe you an orgasm..."

Eva smiled. "It's not a game of balance."

"Still... I'd feel guilty all day." She smiled and slid down Eva's body, kneeling on the floor and lifting Eva's legs onto her shoulders. She looked down at the tangled wet curls, the pink lips glistening between her thighs. She looked back up into Eva's eyes. "Tell me if I'm doing it wrong. I'm still pretty new at this."

"I think you'll do fine."

Kathryn crossed her fingers and wet her lips as she bowed her head.

#

Kathryn finally checked her phone while Eva was in the shower. Five missed calls from Joseph, no messages. The last call had come at a little past ten the night before, which meant he'd given up at least two hours before he went to sleep. She didn't know how she felt about that. She hadn't come home, hadn't called, wasn't answering her phone... surely he must have been a little bit worried. He had to have at least wondered where she was.

Eva came out of the bathroom in a robe. As odd as it had been to see her nude for the first time, Kathryn now thought it was odd to see her wearing clothes. She turned off her phone and stood up, going to her new lover and kissing her passionately. Her breath tasted like toothpaste and mouthwash, and Kathryn enjoyed the tingle on her lips when she pulled back.

"Um." She kept her eyes closed, then shook her head to clear her thoughts. "The, uh, shower's free. I saved you some hot water." 

"Thank you," Kathryn said.

"Sure."

"Not for the hot water."

Eva's eyes softened and her smile widened. "I know."

Kathryn kissed her again before reluctantly pulling away. She went into the bathroom, undid the sheet that had served her as a toga, and stepped into the bath. The room smelled distinctly of Eva; her body wash and shampoo and perfume. It was aromatherapy, and she held the bar of soap in front of her face and breathed deeply as the shower washed away the sweat and other residue from her body. All the evidence she and Eva had spent the night together swirled down the drain, and while she knew it was necessary, she wished she could have gone through the day reeking of what they'd done. She didn't care if anyone else thought she smelled; she wanted to have Eva's fingerprints on her just a little longer.

She finally got out of the shower and toweled off. Clean panties, a pair of artfully ripped jeans, and a lilac blouse were folded next to the sink, and Kathryn rested her hand on top of the pile as she realized what they meant. Eva had gathered the clothes for her so she wouldn't have to go home in yesterday's outfit, then silently slipped into the bathroom and left them on the sink without alerting Kathryn to her presence.

How could one tiny act, such a casual thing, be more intimate than anything in nearly three decades of marriage?

She looked at her reflection in the mirror, her makeup wiped away and her hair slicked back against her skull. She suddenly knew that Eva was the universe giving her a chance. Eva was her way out. She could take the opportunity to escape, or she could let it pass by and accept that Joseph would be the rest of her life.

She dressed, well aware that the panties belonged to Eva as she put them on. They were snug, but they would suffice until she got home and could change into her own. She looked at her reflection again, dragging her middle finger over the crotch of the panties and pressing it against the lips of her sex. She closed her eyes at the soft stroking touch, biting her bottom lip, smiling as she thought about masturbating in the panties and giving them back to Eva unwashed.

Kathryn laughed at herself and took the jeans, slipping them on and sucking in a breath to get them buttoned. Tight again. Eva really was a puny little thing, she decided. She tried on the shirt but took it off before she buttoned it. She carried it back into the living room, hardly aware she was topless until Eva's eyes dropped to her breasts. She blushed and used the shirt to conceal herself. 

"This isn't going to work. I'm a little more... top-heavy than you are."

"Oh. Right... I have a T-shirt."

She brushed past Kathryn on her way to the bedroom and returned with an Old Navy pocket shirt. Kathryn swapped her for the blouse, then pulled the T-shirt over her head. Still tight, and she felt as if her breasts were somehow more on display than they'd been when she was topless, but again it would get her home. She wet her lips and looked at her shoes across the room. When she put on her shoes, it would mean she was leaving. It would mean this first night was over. Even if they were planning to do it again, the first night would never be duplicated.

"Do you want some breakf--"

"Yes, God."

Eva laughed. She stepped forward, her bare toes resting on top of Kathryn's, and she kissed her. Kathryn pushed her hand under Eva's hair to cup the back of her head. Her stomach trembled and flipped, and she touched her tongue to Eva's top lip before she pulled back. 

"I'll go see what I can throw together."

"Okay."

Kathryn watched her go, eyeing her ass without forcing herself to quantify it as anything other than a leer, then followed her into the kitchen.

#

The house was silent and still when Kathryn got home. She called Joseph's name from the front hall, then wandered through the house to find evidence of how he'd spent the evening. A Pizza Hut box was standing on the stove, open to reveal the majority of the pizza was gone with only the crusts remaining to show they had ever existed. The trash can had at least four beer cans that hadn't been there the day before. When she turned on the TV, it was on a blocked channel with an on-screen prompt suggesting she pay to continue watching. She wrinkled her nose and turned away from the set. She supposed she couldn't fault him for watching porn when she'd been across town fucking another woman.

The thought hit her like a slap, so strange and alien in such a familiar environment. She'd spent the night with someone else. Making love, holding... a woman. She had broken her vows. She walked to the couch and dropped onto the edge of the cushion and put her hands over her face. Joseph had never cheated on her. She knew he would have lorded it over her during one fight or another if he had. Having easy access to her body whenever he wanted seemed to be the only thing about the marriage he still enjoyed. 

Not that she enjoyed it. And didn't she deserve a little sexual happiness? In thirty goddamn years, didn't she deserve to have an orgasm that blew off the top of her head? Didn't she deserve to be with someone who could make her heart swim just by looking at her? She deserved to be with someone she lov--

She dropped her hand to her mouth as if she'd almost said the word out loud. She stood up and walked into the bedroom. The bed was unmade, of course, and looked as if it had been torn apart by wild animals. She sighed and shook her head as she shed Eva's clothes. She folded them neatly and then took off the panties with great reluctance. She found an outfit in the closet and dressed for the second time that day, only this time it didn't feel like she was putting on a costume. She buttoned her sweater, tucked it into the jeans that hugged her hips like they had been tailored, and pinned her hair back. She looked at herself in the mirror, and she saw Eva's clothes on the bed behind her.

Housewife. Wife. That was who she was, no matter who she had been the night before. She turned off the bedroom light and took out her phone as she went into the living room. She dialed Joseph's number and stood in front of the television as it rang. She counted the rings and knew it was one away from jumping to voicemail when he responded.

"Look who decided to show up."

The devil in her shoulder whispered that she should disguise her voice and say something shocking. " _Mr. Tramonto, this is the Puerta de Sol Police Department. We found this phone at a crime scene. Have you seen your wife today?_ "

Instead, she meekly said, "Hi, Joe. I'm sorry about last night, I--"

"Where the fuck were you?"

She closed her eyes. _I was just about to fucking tell you where I was._ "I was with a friend from photography class. We were working on a project and she said I could use her darkroom to develop some of my pictures. By the time we were finished I was so exhausted I didn't even check my phone. I just passed out on her couch."

"I was worried sick about you."

She picked up the remote control, accessed the interactive guide, and checked to see when he had bought the porn. 11:49, almost two hours after he'd stopped calling to see where she was. _Yeah, you were real goddamn worried, weren't you?_ "I'm sorry, Joey. It won't happen again, I promise. I was just so caught up in the pictures and the developing, time just completely got away from me."

"Well, I hope you had fun while I was home worried sick."

 _I did have fun, and I had the most mind-blowing orgasm I've ever had. I ate a woman's pussy, you fucker, and she went down on me, and she made me come. She made me come like you never have. What do you think about that?_ Aloud: "I'm sorry. How many times do I have to say it, Joseph? I'm sorry. I'm really fucking sorry." Her eyes widened, surprised at herself.

"Don't talk to me that way."

"I'm sorry. I'm just tired. My back hurts from sleeping on the f... fucking couch all night." She swallowed, glad she'd caught herself before she said 'floor.' 

"Good thing you don't have a real job to go to today."

Kathryn closed her eyes and tightened her grip on both the phone and the remote control. Her thought _I don't love you_ was quickly followed by _I hate you_. "Right."

"I was feeling like meatloaf last night. Maybe you could make up for that tonight."

"Sure."

"And then maybe dessert."

She cringed at the thought of being with him so soon after being with Eva. The idea made her skin crawl, as if sleeping with Joseph was the infidelity. "I'd like that."

"Okay."

She started to say "I love you" out of tradition and habit, but the click of a disconnected line interrupted her. She stared at the phone, then disconnected. The battery was dangerously low, so she went to the charger and plugged it in. She went to the bedroom and stared at the tangle of unmade sheets, then picked up Eva's panties and balled them into her fist as she walked out of the room. She couldn't sleep in that man's bed, not today.

Instead she stretched out on the couch, the hand with Eva's underwear up near her face like a section of security blanket.

#

Eva smoothed her hair down, tying it into a bun at the nape of her neck. She wore the standard navy-blue polo shirt with the department's insignia on the breast tucked into tan khakis. The windbreaker identifying her as a member of the crime scene unit hung on a peg behind her as she finished with her hair and shut the locker door. Deacon James came in with his duffel bag and placed it on the bench next to her, offering a perfunctory hello before he looked at her again.

"Whoo," he said as he spun in his locker combination. "Someone got lucky last night. What was her name?"

Eva looked at him and then quickly looked away. "Not important. What, you can tell?"

He put his hands on her shoulders and gave a quick, rough massage. Anyone else would have pulled back a few broken fingers, but Eva and Deacon were close enough that she accepted the abuse like any little sister would. He patted the side of her head. 

"You're lighter, Alvarez. Less bunched up. And you're glowing. Whoever it was, they must've been great. Hope you kept the escort service's number."

"I was hoping you'd be able to give me her personal number."

"Why would I know her number?"

"What kind of son doesn't know his own mama's number?"

He swatted at her but she easily evaded his blow. She double-tapped him on the back of the head, stepping over the bench to get past him. Once she was out of his sight she took a detour into the bathroom. She rested her hands on the sink and stared at herself, trying to spot the differences Deacon had seen at a glance. She touched her cheek with her fingers and brushed her thumb over her lip. Could being with Kathryn really change her on such a fundamental level? That someone could look at her and know something had occurred the night before? 

She thought it was a definite yes. She'd been with women before, women she'd harbored crushes on, and none of those times had felt like it did with Kathryn. So many of her relationships felt like work, like building a house of cards. With Kathryn it felt like the house was already there and all she had to do was not knock it over.

#

Joseph got home at his usual time in the afternoon and immediately took Kathryn's hand to take her into the bedroom. She let him take off her clothes, grateful that she'd already put Eva's clothes aside to be returned. He put her facedown on the bed and she hugged the pillow as he did what he had to do. She stared at the wall, moving against him when prompted, grunting with feigned pleasure so he wouldn't start moving faster. He pulled out of her and finished in the small of her back, making her feel used and dirty until she could grab a towel and clean it away.

"Did you finish?" he asked.

"Yeah."

"Good," he grunted. "Did you start the meatloaf?"

"And mashed potatoes. They should be ready in about half an hour."

"Good. Good." He pulled his pants back on and walked out of the bedroom. She was glad he hadn't made her put him in her mouth; the taste always made her vaguely ill, and today of all days she knew she wouldn't have been able to hide her disgust. She went to the bathroom to wet her towel, giving the stain in the middle of her back another scrubbing. She could still feel it there and wanted it gone before she put her shirt and pants back on.

How could she have thought that was sex? All this time, she'd been calling it by that name only to find out the real thing was a completely different animal. She dried off her back, finally feeling clean again, and dressed for the third time that day. When she passed through the living room Joseph was watching the local news on mute waiting for the sports to start. There had been a car accident at noon, and Kathryn paused when they showed a shot of the scene.

A few feet behind the mangled wreck, a woman in khakis and a blue windbreaker was bent forward with a camera held to her face to snap a picture of the asphalt. Her hair was tied back in a bun, but it was undeniably her. She was only on-screen for about three seconds, and even then she was just in the background of a police official talking about the involvement of alcohol, but to Kathryn she had taken up the entire screen.

"You make a better door than a window."

She stepped away from the TV without responding to his comment, going into the kitchen to check on their dinner. Her heart was in her throat, and she had to tuck her hands under her arms to keep them from shaking. She caught her reflection in the mirror on the door of the fridge and saw that she was smiling.

When she was serving up the food, Joseph came into the kitchen to get a beer. He looked at her - and only then did she realize that was the first time he'd actually looked _at_ her since coming home - and swatted her on the ass. "You look like one well-fucked woman."

"I am."

He chuckled as he popped the top of his beer and walked back into the living room. 

"For the first time ever," she said without giving sound to the words as she mouthed them. "And it wasn't you."

She added the mashed potatoes, then poured a dollop of ketchup onto the meat. She carried the plate into the living room and held it out to him. She thought of a dozen... a hundred things she wanted to say to him. The meek and eager-to-please part of her wanted to plead. _If you'll just do this, or this, or this, maybe I would stay._ But she silenced that voice because she knew she was going to stay with him no matter what. She wasn't going to throw away her marriage.

And she wasn't going to give up Eva. She couldn't, not after what they'd shared. If that made her a cheater and an adulteress, so be it. She could live with the label if it meant having Eva in her life. She went back into the kitchen to prepare her dinner, the first meal of her double life. She expected it to taste like ashes, anticipated the meal sitting like a stone in her stomach, weighed down by her guilt and shame.

The meat was delicious and succulent, and the mashed potatoes were divine. Afterward she thought it was perhaps the best meal she'd ever eaten.


	4. Chapter 4

The next time they saw each other was the day before their next class. Kathryn was glad to see that Eva seemed awkward as well, smiling and shuffling her feet before she decided they could greet each other with a kiss. First a quick one on the cheek, followed by one on the lips that lingered. Eva sucked her bottom lip into her mouth when they pulled apart. Her dark eyes sparkled as she looked at Kathryn.

"How are you?"

"I'm doing very well. Very, very well. You?"

Eva nodded. "Fantastic. People are even commenting on it at work. Apparently, I'm... I don't know. Smiling a lot or something."

"You're smiling right now."

The smile widened, wrinkling Eva's eyes. "Am I?"

"Yes." Kathryn leaned in to kiss her again, teasing with her tongue before she pulled back. "I adore kissing you..."

Eva blinked and then stepped back. "We should probably focus on the last few pictures we need before we have fun. Otherwise we won't get anything done."

"Probably wise."

Eva kissed her one more time, moaning to show how helpless she was, and then touched Kathryn's cheek. "Later."

"Yes. Definitely."

They went back to the park so Eva could get her fifth shot for the assignment. Eva took a bag of bagels past their expiration date out of the fridge without explanation, swinging it against her hip as they walked. Occasionally their hands brushed together but Kathryn always moved her hand away. She gave Eva a lingering look as explanation, and Eva nodded that she understood why they couldn't walk down the street holding hands, as much as they both might want to. 

When they got to the park Eva directed them toward a pond in the northeastern corner. A raft of ducks was drifting along one side of the water, and Eva explained what she wanted Kathryn to do. Kathryn agreed, and Eva tromped around the edge of the pond to get into position. The ducks were aware of her presence but only changed their group direction rather than fleeing. Eva crouched, lined up the shot, then held up her left hand with the thumb extended.

Kathryn held the top of the bagel bag with one hand and shook it. The ducks heard the sound and immediately lifted off as one entity, wings extended and bodies trailing water as they hopped from one side of the pond to the other in an impressive display of group-think. By the time Kathryn got the bag open, she was surrounded by quacking ducks waddling from side to side as if impatient for their snack.

Eva told her to break the bagels up into pieces before she tossed them, and she did the best she could with the most impatient clientele ever. Thankfully they didn't seem aggressive to her or each other, and soon the bag was empty. She held it upside down to shake out the crumbs and the ducks immediately lost interest in her, circling with their bills to the ground as they looked for any scrap they may have missed.

"Did you get it?" Kathryn asked when Eva approached.

"We'll see. I'm glad you're not scared of ducks."

"Ducks, no. Geese are a different story."

"Well, sure. Geese will chase you."

With the picture taken, Kathryn tossed the bag in the trash and they walked back to the house. Once the door closed behind her, Kathryn realized that she already felt at home there. She was more at home there than in her own home, with her own husband. Eva started toward the darkroom, but Kathryn reached out and grabbed her hand. Eva stopped, their extended arms linking them together across the hall.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong." She pulled Eva to her and Eva fell into her embrace. They kissed, Kathryn's brow furrowed as she explored Eva's mouth with her tongue. Eva held her camera out to one side as she spread the fingers of the other over Kathryn's ass. The flash startled Kathryn and she looked accusingly at the camera as if it had taken the picture without being told to, then looked at Eva.

"I can overexpose it... destroy the shot. I just--"

"Don't do that. I want to see it."

Eva nodded.

"Now. I want to see it now."

Eva smiled. "Okay. Come on."

They went into the darkroom and shut off the lights. Kathryn still wasn't comfortable with the development part of the process, which was a full fourth of their grade, so Eva used the opportunity to teach and demonstrate the procedure. She developed the assigned shot first, teasing them both because they both knew they wouldn't be able to concentrate once they had the kiss picture. Kathryn was awed by the shot, capturing a half-dozen of the ducks as they took off. The water seemed to be clinging to their feathers and webbed feet, their reflections vibrant on the rippled water of the lake underneath them.

"This shot is alive," Kathryn whispered. "Oh, my God. You're so talented."

Eva said, "I want you to have it."

"No. You... this... you need to have this for, for--"

"I want you to have it. I want you to put it somewhere you'll see it. Where it will catch your eye and you'll think of me."

Kathryn couldn't take her eyes off the picture. "Thank you. You have to turn it in first."

"But then you'll take it?"

"Yes. If you want me to have it."

"I need you to have it."

"Then okay. Thank you so much."

Eva hung the picture so it could dry. "I love photography, but my skill was textbook. I didn't have heart. I just took pictures of what was in front of me. That's why I started taking this class. I wanted to take pictures of beautiful things and have them be beautiful. Our teacher has been very enthusiastic, and helpful, but you're the first person who ever said I was talented. Thank you, Kathryn."

"I meant it."

"I know." She smiled. "That's why I want you to have the picture. I guess I found my heart."

Kathryn looked at her. "I hope I had something to do with it."

Eva met her gaze and slowly nodded. 

"I want to see the kiss picture now."

Eva agreed. She went through the process again, and their profiles slowly faded into visibility under the fluid. 

_Two faces caught in such an extreme close-up that immediate identification is almost impossible. The profile on the left side of the shot is tilted to the left, while the other woman - the focus of the shot, is straight and steady. Their lips are parted and joined, no hint of space between them. Strands of dark hair fall across the face of the woman on the left. The woman on the right has small lines between her eyebrows, as if concentrating on the moment with an intensity few people grant to a simple kiss._

Kathryn kissed the back of Eva's neck, and Eva pressed her hips against the table to keep from swaying. She moved her hands around in front of her and undid the buttons of her blouse, starting from the bottom and working her way up. She sucked Eva's earlobe and put her hands under the veil of her shirt to stroke her stomach. 

"I'm sorry. I can't help myself."

"Who asked you to?" Eva turned her head and their lips met again. 

Kathryn was more confident this time, taking control as she removed Eva's clothes. She let the blouse and bra fall to the floor and then bent to take one nipple into her mouth. She played over it with her tongue as she undid the button of Eva's slacks, pushing them down to mid-thigh and then pressing her hand to the crotch of Eva's panties. She rubbed as she switched to the other breast, moaning hungrily, kissing her way up the swell to rest her cheek on Eva's collarbone. She pushed her fingers under the cotton and touched Eva's smooth skin.

"I love the way you feel," Kathryn said, her eyes half-open to watch Eva as she stroked. 

"I love the way you make me feel." Eva covered Kathryn's hand with her own, guiding it. Her other hand rested on Kathryn's chest, feeling her breast through the blouse. The material was gray and just thin enough to see the outline of her bra. Eva couldn't believe how beautiful the blouse was; she didn't think anyone could make a long-sleeved gray blouse look sexy, but Kathryn had done the impossible.

As much as she liked the shirt, she pulled it up and off when Kathryn stopped kissing her breasts. They grappled with each other for a moment, clothes dropping to the floor of the darkroom like leaves in winter. Eva knelt and brought Kathryn down with her, laying her on the floor and then lying on top of her. Kathryn spread her legs and hooked her ankles behind Eva's body, pinning her in place.

"I have toys in the bedroom..."

"Not yet. I just want you. Tongue, fingers--"

"Yeah." Eva cupped Kathryn's head with both hands and thrust against her. Kathryn rolled her head back and dug her fingers into Eva's ass, pulling her forward as she lifted her hips. Kathryn came with a cry that Eva muffled with a kiss, and then Kathryn used her fingers to finish Eva off, watching her face with wide-eyed awe as Eva rocked against her hand. She hunched forward twice, stiffened, and then settled comfortably against Kathryn's hip.

"I love you."

The words slipped out on a loose breath, and Kathryn was grateful she didn't have a chance to stop them. She brought her head up and kissed Eva's slick, salty skin.

"Is that okay?"

"Yes. I love you, too."

Kathryn closed her eyes to hold back the tears, lips pressed so tightly together they would have been white in another room. She tightened her grip on Eva's body and stroked the length of her spine. After a long moment of cuddling on the floor they both sat up. Eva stood to dress, and Kathryn remained on the floor to watch as her nudity was covered up. She stroked the outside of Eva's thigh through her jeans, and Eva brushed the back of her hand over Kathryn's hair.

"I have food today, if you want to eat dinner here."

"I do."

Eva held out her hand and Kathryn took it. She let herself be hauled up, then bent down to retrieve and put on her own clothes. Once she was dressed she took Eva's hand in her left, took the picture of their kiss in her right, and led the way out of the room. Eva indicated for her to sit in the breakfast nook while she prepared the food. Kathryn was so accustomed to cooking and serving that she didn't know what to do with herself. So she sat and stared at the picture of their kiss, evidence that what they were doing was actually real and not just a fantasy or delusion. Who was the beautiful woman in the shot with Eva? Who was that carefree, wanton, sexual woman with her mouth open wide for another woman's tongue? 

She smiled and chewed on her thumbnail, one bare foot resting on top of the other. She felt young. At least half her age. She looked into the kitchen at Eva with her mussed hair and wrong-buttoned shirt. Her life had been fast-forwarded past the adventurous twenties, forcing her to be responsible and grown-up while her friends were experimenting and figuring out who they were. Would she have experimented? Would she have kissed a girl in college and discovered how wonderful it was? God, could her eyes have been opened all those years ago?

But if they were, would she still be single in her late-forties? Would she have been adrift enough to join a photography class and meet Eva Alvarez? Maybe her life had just been put on pause just long enough to get her where she needed to be. 

Eva interrupted her train of thought by bringing over a meal of leftovers, placing one bowl in front of Kathryn before taking a seat across from her.

"Thank you," she said, "it looks delicious."

"I can reheat with the best of them." She winked.

"No, it's just... what I always want to hear when I deliver dinner. I never do."

Eva watched her for a moment. "May I ask you something if I promise you don't have to answer?" Kathryn nodded carefully. "Have you ever cheated before?"

"No."

"So why am I different?"

Kathryn rubbed her finger over the handle of her knife. "I don't know. Maybe if I knew I would have been able to stop it." She quickly brought up her hand. "Not that I want to stop it. I was never tempted before you. There were moments, I suppose, but never anything strong enough or real enough to risk my whole life to pursue."

"Same question. Why am I different?"

"Because I..." She rubbed her fingertips over her thumb. "Because it was..." She looked out the window. The sun was already starting to set and she was startled. Her days with Eva always seemed to be ending, while her days with Joseph seemed to last for weeks. Why was the sun always racing for the horizon when she was actually happy? "Because I've never met anyone who makes me feel the way you do. All you have to do is look at me and it's like... taking medicine. I feel better just because you're near. Because I know that if I need something, like a kind word or a smile, I know I can count on you to provide it without being asked. Because you can tell when I need something. Because you accept that I might need something and you're willing to give it without reciprocity. Because my heart couldn't stand saying goodbye to you without knowing you'll be coming back."

Eva smiled. "Wow. I didn't know I was doing all that."

"Because it's not an effort. You do it without thinking. That's what makes it special."

Eva smiled. "Now I'm all self-conscious."

"Oh. Then I'm going to take full advantage of it. Tell me about yourself. I know the grown-up you pretty well, but I want to know about the teenager."

Eva smiled. "Teenager. Oh, you don't want to know about that."

"I do. Even more now."

"There's not much to tell. I was a good little girl, no rebellion... I think I stored it up until I was an adult so the things I did weren't just written off as typical teenage shit. I started dating women just because it wasn't the expected thing to do, but when I tried to go back to men I realized I'd never really felt anything for them. It was like comparing a photograph of Rome to actually visiting there."

"So I'm assuming that first romance didn't work out?"

Eva chuckled. "No. Although the romance may have had a better chance of success if I'd actually told her how I felt, instead of just pining away, weeping in my dorm room, pounding my pillow every night. She was straight and married."

"Aha. So this is a habit with you."

"No!"

Kathryn smiled nervously. "I'm sorry. I was only teasing."

Eva looked down at her food with guilt. "I know. But it needs to be said. I don't pursue married women, or straight women. I don't know why I couldn't stop flirting with you. I knew I should, and I knew I was setting myself up for heartbreak, but I just couldn't stop myself. You kept drawing me in, too."

"I'm glad you didn't fight it. And you shouldn't consider your streak broken. After the past week, I'm not entirely sure I'm straight anyway. I got with Joseph when we were so young. And I was never really happy with him. I just thought it was what people did. The dirty secret of grown-ups was that no one really enjoyed each other's company. God, I wish I'd met you when I was twenty."

"I would have been seven years old."

"Good _Lord_ ," Kathryn moaned. "Don't tell me that."

Eva laughed. "It's fine. I like older women. Even though you don't seem like an older woman." She raised an eyebrow and put her foot on Kathryn's under the table. Kathryn dipped her chin and smiled. 

"So... ahem. Why did you go into crime scene photography? It seems so gruesome."

"It can be, I admit. But it can also be like a puzzle. You take pictures of something horrible, and then you try to piece together how it happened. It makes it seem possible to make some sense out of this world. Finding order in the chaos can be cathartic."

"Hm. I like that."

They ate in silence for a while before Eva looked out the window. The sky was painted in purples, blues, and pinks. She shifted in her seat as if she was suddenly uncomfortable and looked at the food left in her bowl. "I'm not trying to get rid of you, I just want to be warned in regard to how much time we have left. I don't want you to get in trouble."

Kathryn looked at the clock and smiled ruefully. "I'm already in trouble. Dinner will be late, so I'm bound to get a lecture about my wifely duties."

Eva worked her jaw and looked out the window, but it was Kathryn who came up with the solution.

"How about sundown? When the sun goes down, I'll head for home. No later than that."

"I guess that... would be okay. Do you need a ride?"

"No, Joe took the day off so I borrowed his truck."

"Oh. Right. I watched you pull up." She smiled at her memory slip. "I wish I could spend the night with you, but it's probably not feasible again."

"No," Kathryn agreed reluctantly. She reached across the table and took Eva's hand. "But I want to spend the night with you, too."

Eva rubbed her thumb over Kathryn's knuckles and smiled at her.

#

Kathryn was already going to get home fifteen minutes after dinner was usually served, so she stopped at KFC and picked up a bucket of chicken with the sides Joseph liked. At a stop light she brought her hand up to her nose, sniffing deeply to see if she could smell Eva on the fingers. How long ago had they been inside her? Would Joseph even notice? She decided it was better not to chance it and opened a small bottle of lotion. She rubbed it into her skin, prompting the car behind her to honk when the light turned green. She waved an apology, the scent of green apples wafting through the car and mixing with the chicken, and proceeded through the intersection.

The lights were on when she got home, and she carried the food in through the kitchen. "Hi, sweetheart." She said the words by routine, barely even noticing as they left her lips. Joseph came in from the living room as she was getting the plates out of the cupboard. She would pick at a piece of chicken, maybe have some potato wedges, just to give the impression she was eating with him.

"Where the hell have you been?"

"Photography class."

"You said that was just an hour and a half on Tuesdays and Thursdays."

She shrugged. "It's photography class, Joe. It's not just sitting in a room reading textbooks and learning technique. I have to go out and take pictures to fulfill the assignment specifications." She considered stopping there, but something made her go on. "I met this really neat woman there. She's a crime-scene photographer. She took a lot of amazing pictures in the park the other day. If I could have half her talent--"

"Is this dinner?"

She was startled by his sudden question and had to switch gears. "Uh. Yes. I knew I'd be late so I stopped by--"

"I could have picked this up myself."

"Then why didn't you?" she said. 

"Maybe if you'd called to let me know you would be late..."

She shook her head. "You would just have used the time to script this lecture instead of doing it off the cuff. Although God knows you must have the son of a bitch memorized by now. You have to wait for me to get home to make you dinner, you have to be served like a child... are you a fucking invalid? Can't you even feed yourself without mommy coming in to do it for you?"

She realized she had gone too far as soon as she stopped speaking, but she knew she couldn't take it back. She was relieved she couldn't take it back. 

Joseph's eyes were narrow, his face red, and he was taking great pains to control his breathing as he stared at her.

Kathryn turned away and placed three pieces of chicken on his plate. She served the green beans and potato wedges, then took one of the plastic forks from the wrapper and dropped it on top of the plate. She shoved it across the counter to him and flicked her fingers with a flourish. " _Bon appetit_." She stepped around him and stormed out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm not hungry."

She went into their bedroom and walked to her side of the bed. She dropped onto the mattress and put her elbows on her knees, leaning forward to cover her face in case the tears started to come. When her eyes remained dry, she fished her phone out of her pocket and dialed Eva's number. She let it ring once and then disconnected with a quiet curse. She stood up and walked to the window, hugging herself as she looked outside.

The phone rang and she knew it was Eva before she looked at the screen. It was programmed to show a picture of Eva whenever she called, and though she was fully-dressed in the picture, Kathryn couldn't help but picturing her in some of the sensual shots they'd taken that first night. Finally, she answered the call.

"Hi. Sorry... butt-dial."

"Oh. I wanted to be sure. I was worried something might be wrong. But if you're okay..."

Kathryn chewed her bottom lip. _I'm not okay. Not at all. Come over here. Come get me. Take me away._ She rested her head against the glass.

"Eva."

"Yeah?"

"No, I... was just saying your name."

"Kathryn."

"Eva."

"Kathryn."

She smiled and looked out at the neighbor's fence. "I wish I lived in an apartment so I could look out over the city and imagine you out there looking at me."

"Hold on." A pause and the sound of movement. "I'm at the window. Which way are you from my house?"

"North."

"Oh. Hold on." More movement. "Okay. I'm at the window looking out toward you."

Kathryn didn't tell Eva she was facing west. To face Eva's house she would have to stand at the kitchen window, and she didn't want to face Joseph just yet. 

"I decided I like sunset as our leaving time."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Because that means it's always dark when you're not here."

Kathryn's eyes burned with tears. "I love you, Eva."

"I love you, too."

"No, say my name."

"I love you, Kathryn."

She smiled. "Thank you. I should go."

"Okay. Will I see you in class tomorrow night?"

She didn't want to risk Joseph's ire at another unexpected absence, so she said, "Yeah. I'll try to get there early so we can sit together and talk for a bit."

"I'd like that. I'll see you there."

"Bye, sweetie."

Kathryn said, "Not sweetie. Or sweetheart." She thought for a moment. "Could you... could you call me..."

"My heart."

Kathryn's heart leapt in her chest and she took a deep breath. "Yes. That."

"Have a good night, my heart."

"You too, darling."

She ended the call and put the phone down on the nightstand. She stared at it and put her hand to her lips, considering if she should just go to bed (making the next day come that much quicker) or go play penitent for Joseph to have peace in the household. She eventually decided on the latter. If she waited until later to make nice, she had a feeling that her apology would come with sex. And the more time she spent with Eva, the more of a liar she felt when she went to bed with Joseph.

She picked up her camera and realized she needed one more picture outside of her comfort zone. She turned the camera around and aimed the lens at herself. She turned her head just as she snapped the picture.

_A dark room with a single lamp lit. A woman standing before the camera, arms extended to either side of the lens. An obvious self-portrait. She's dressed in a sweater over a white blouse. Her hair is down and resting on her shoulders in equal lengths like curtains. Her head is in the process of turning (captured motion), her features a blur. But several things are clear to see. Eyes cast downward. Lips set into a hard line. It's the face of a tremendously sad person, a woman who lives in the shadows by avoiding the light._

Kathryn put the camera down before she went into the living room. Joseph was back in place before the television, plate on his lap, ignoring her as she stopped next to his chair. He waited until a commercial break before he finally looked at her.

"What the hell was that about?"

"Sorry. It was a long day."

"You don't talk to me like that."

"I understand. It won't happen again." She went into the kitchen and saw the counter was clear. It took her a moment to track the smell of chicken to the trash can, the bucket lying upside down in the spilled contents of the side items. Anger boiled in her chest, threatening to burst out through her mouth. She wasn't hungry, but he didn't know she'd eaten. She felt her ears burning at the stupid, passive-aggressive gesture. 

She went back to the living room. "That was perfectly good food."

"You said you weren't hungry."

"It could have been your lunch tomorrow."

He shrugged. "I don't think I'll feel like chicken."

She rubbed her forehead. "It was food, Joe. I paid for it, I--"

" _I_ paid for it. I can do what I want with it. If you're hungry, go ahead and pluck it out of the trash and make yourself a plate. I don't give a shit."

"No, you don't." She swallowed the lump in her throat and shook her head as she walked past him to the front door. "I'm going for a walk."

She didn't have her phone with her. It was a decent neighborhood, but he still could have expressed some kind of interest in her safety. But the door shut behind her on silence. She stood on the porch for a long time trying to think of where the hell she could go. Finally she just went to the driveway and leaned against the truck, sliding down until she was sitting on the driveway where she couldn't be seen from the front door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains a non-graphic scene of spousal rape, as well as a moment of domestic violence. Reader discretion is advised.

"He threw it in the trash?"

Kathryn nodded, on the verge of tears from recounting the awful experience. "It was like a slap in the face."

Eva looked down at her hands. She would have slapped him. Hell, she'd have done a whole lot worse if she had been there. She put her hand on top of Kathryn's and held it there, waiting until Kathryn turned her hand around and linked their fingers. It was their most public display of affection yet, sitting at one of the light tables in class, the other students separating into cliques to look over their "comfort zone" pictures. Kathryn had developed her final shot that morning, crying when she saw how utterly broken she appeared in the picture.

"I'm sorry," Eva whispered.

"It's not your fault."

"No, I'm sorry that I can't do anything to help you. If you need a place to stay..."

"No. I can't leave him."

Eva started to argue that there was nothing keeping her there, but she didn't want to push Kathryn anywhere she didn't want to go. They examined their photos, trying to find the best arrangement for them. Kathryn was embarrassed to have hers out in public, but Eva seemed fine with them. She looked at Eva's pictures and settled on the one taken when she'd been overrun by the escaped clients of a dog-walker. The canines had swarmed around her like a river, and Eva had captured her in the middle of a carefree laugh.

She put the dog picture next to the self-portrait. How could that be the same person? How could the company she kept make such a monumental difference in her entire demeanor? She looked up and saw Eva watching her. 

"You make me happy."

Eva blinked. "I'm just... regifting it."

Kathryn looked down at the pictures again. A minute or two later, the class was brought to order by the teacher's arrival. Kathryn warned him her photo set was risqué, and he assured her they wouldn't be seen by anyone else in class. Several people had chosen erotic art as their "comfort zone" project, so he wasn't surprised. He assured her he would be professional and she handed them over.

After class, Eva sat with her on the bench to wait for Joseph to arrive. Kathryn put her camera case on her lap, resting her hands on top of it. Eva crossed her legs and linked her fingers on the outside of her knee. The parking lot cleared out quickly, and soon they were alone. Eva tilted her head back and looked at the stars. 

"If you weren't married, I'd take you home right now."

Kathryn flexed her fingers. "My home or yours?"

"Mine. I'd take you to my home. And I'd undress you. I would undress you right in the foyer, and I would kneel in front of you." 

Kathryn took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I would... put my leg. Over your shoulder." She coughed into her fist. "And push your head forward. I'd hold it there."

"How long?"

"Until you'd done your job."

Eva smiled and Kathryn chuckled to hide her embarrassment. Joseph's familiar truck appeared and their demeanor shifted to stoic again. Kathryn stood up and looked down at Eva. 

"I love you."

Eva didn't want to risk Joseph reading her lips and simply nodded. "Ditto."

Kathryn signaled that she understood with a nod. Joseph pulled up and Kathryn stepped through the headlights again. Eva stood up, adjusting the strap of her camera case as she stepped forward.

"Hello, Mr. Tramonto."

He looked at her with suspicion. Beyond him, she could see Kathryn half-in and half-out of the truck, staring at her in horror and confusion.

"Do I know you?"

"I know your wife. I'm in her photography class. I'm Eva."

She held out her hand, but he just stared at it.

"Oh. Well, hey."

"Your wife is very talented."

"Sure. Look, not to be rude, but we should get going."

Eva nodded. "I just wanted to meet Kathryn's husband. You're a lucky man."

"Yeah." He chuckled. "Some days it's more obvious than others."

Eva looked past him. "See you Thursday, Kathryn."

Kathryn just nodded. Joseph lifted his hand in a dismissive wave and pulled away from the curb. Eva watched him go, adjusted the strap of her camera again, and walked to where her truck was standing alone in the middle of the parking lot.

#

Kathryn waited until Joe was in the shower before she dialed Eva's number, going out into the backyard so he wouldn't hear her voice through the wall and ask who she was talking with. Eva answered on the second ring and spoke before Kathryn could. "I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself. I had to speak with him."

Kathryn's anger evaporated as if sucked out into the night sky. She closed her eyes, one arm across her stomach. She tilted her head back and looked at the moon. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. It put you in a horrible position. I wanted to apologize immediately, but I know that would have just made it worse."

"Nothing you could do could ever make my life worse," Kathryn whispered. "It's been better since you arrived. Every second of it, even when you're away. I'm better because I know you're out there. I hear your voice when I fall asleep. I wake up happy because for those first few seconds I don't remember if it's a day I'll see you or not. You make me remember what it was like to have hope, Eva."

Eva was quiet for a long few minutes and then said, "You have no idea how you make me feel, Kathryn. I was drawn to you because you're beautiful, but you're also so kind, and so loving, and so creative. You have a beautiful soul. Sometimes I'll look at you and wonder what you're thinking because you're so deep in thought. I want to know you, Kathryn. And I think it would take a lifetime to say I know you. And I'm willing to take the time."

Kathryn turned to the house and slapped her hand against the brick until her hand stung.

"Kathryn? What was that?"

"Nothing. It's... I'm just..." She shook her head. "Sometimes I wish I'd never met you, Eva. It would be so much easier." She wet her lips. "But I would be so much worse off without you in my life. I don't know how I got by before I had you as a lifeline. You make me remember what it was like to be Kathryn Latimer instead of Mrs. Tramonto."

"Is that your maiden name?"

"Yes."

"Then that's what I'll call you from now on."

Kathryn smiled. "Thank you."

"I really am sorry for what I did."

"I'm not. I love you, Eva."

"I love you, too. Sleep well, my heart."

Kathryn whispered, "My heart," and disconnected the call. She went back into the house seconds before the shower shut off. 

#

The next morning Kathryn and Eva were in bed within an hour of Joseph leaving for work. Their kiss hello at Eva's front door had transformed into something hungrier, more desperate, and Kathryn walked her into the bedroom and began peeling the clothes off her body. Each piece of skin was a new territory that Kathryn explored in full before allowing herself to move on. She circled Eva's nipples with her tongue before her bra hit the floor, gripping her by the hips and hauling her onto the bed to move down to her hips, her thighs, the inside of her knees and then back up to nuzzle between her breasts.

Eva was naked except for her panties and socks, and she gripped Kathryn's head with both hands and forced her to look up. Eva was flush and breathless, and Kathryn's hair had fallen across half her face like a raven wing. Eva brushed it aside and smiled, circling her thumb on Kathryn's cheek. "I have a surprise for you."

"Oh?"

Eva twisted and stretched for the nightstand, opening the top drawer to receive something that seemed both insubstantial and heavy at the same time. It took Kathryn a moment to recognize the leather straps as what they were, the realization helped by the dildo dangling from one end of it. She sat up, drawing her legs up under her and watching with wide-eyed wonder as Eva untangled the straps and held it up.

"You want to use that on me?"

"No," Eva said. "It's yours. I want you to use it on me."

Kathryn's eyes widened.

"Your husband... granted, I only know what you tell me and what I gleaned last night, but I get the impression that sex with him isn't like sex with me. He uses you like a sex toy. He uses his cock to exert his dominance over you. Sex is a mind game with your husband, all because he wields the sword." She held out the harness. "I'm giving you the sword. Use it on me."

Kathryn lightly brushed her fingers over the shaft of the toy. She'd never even considered wearing a cock before, never thought of herself in that position. But with Eva...

She pushed herself off the bed and stood up to undress. Eva watched with interest, wetting her fingers and idly stroking the cock as Kathryn did the most utilitarian striptease in history. She stepped out of her panties, tossed aside her bra, and then took the strap-on from Eva and examined it before she bent down to step into the nylon hoops. She dragged it up her hips, and Eva scooted to the edge of the bed to help her make the proper adjustments.

"Is that too tight?"

"No, it feels fine... h-have you used one of these before?"

Eva nodded. "I have. On both sides."

Kathryn gulped and nodded, grateful at least one of them would know what they were doing. Once it was secured, Eva said, "Now we have to make it wet, since... well, it won't do that on its own." She wet her lips and before Kathryn could ask how they were going to do that, she took the tip of the toy into her mouth and began to suck. Kathryn pointed her toes and parted her lips in shock, leaning back and watching as Eva worked her mouth to take the dildo deeper into her mouth. She thought of all the times Joseph had made her do this, how humiliated it had made her feel, but Eva... God, Eva looked so gorgeous. 

Eva looked up at her and Kathryn managed a weak smile. She didn't know what to do with her hands, so she crossed her wrists behind her back and began to thrust gently. Eva's cheeks were hollowed, her tongue a pink flicker that occasionally slipped along the edge of the shaft before her lips overtook it again.

Kathryn exhaled and pushed Eva back. "I want to now."

"You want to what?"

"I want to fuck you."

Eva smiled evilly, holding eye contact as she twisted her lower body to get her panties off. She also took a second to peel off her socks and toss them aside, retreating toward the headboard as Kathryn joined her on the bed again. The cock slapped against Kathryn's thighs as she walked on her knees toward Eva. Eva spread her legs, her sex pink and wet, ready for her, and Kathryn felt the blood rushing to her face as she took the unusual position. Eva rubbed herself and then spread the juices over the tip of the dildo.

Kathryn put her hand against the headboard, looping the thumb and forefinger of the other around the base of her cock. She looked down and tried to remember how Joseph did it. She didn't have any experience with anyone else, and she didn't want the moment to be anything like how it was with Joe, but she also didn't want to screw it up. She hesitated and then whispered, "I... I don't..."

"Here... let me." Eva took the toy and drew it forward, rubbing herself with the blunt tip before letting it push into her. She sucked in a breath through her teeth and stretched out her neck, rolling her shoulders as she angled her hips to complement Kathryn's position. 

"Slow?" Kathryn whispered.

"At first." Eva's eyes were closed, her eyelashes fluttering like butterfly wings. "Then whatever you want."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't."

Kathryn sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and looked down, rolling her hips forward. Her toes curled as she watched the lips wrap around the toy, and she pulled back to see the length of it streaked with moisture. She figured out the right combinations of muscles to flex to push inside, how to pull back without moving her entire body, and her hand slid down from the headboard to Eva's shoulder. She was fully aware of the bed's voice as she moved on it, the creak and sigh of the springs as her weight shifted back and forth.

"This is amazing," she whispered.

"Feels amazing," Eva confirmed.

"Can you open your eyes?"

Eva kept them closed for a long moment but then they fluttered open and her lips curled into a smile. Kathryn experimented with moving a little faster, and Eva's eyes closed and she tilted her head back with a sigh of pleasure. Kathryn dropped her hand from Eva's shoulder to her chest, sliding it up to the curve of her left breast. She felt Eva's heart pounding and closed her eyes, thrusting faster. Eva brought her legs up on either side of Kathryn and, when Kathryn looked down, she saw that her entire toy was pushing into Eva before she pulled it out again. "Oh, God, I'm fucking you."

"So good..."

"I'm fucking you."

"I know, baby."

Kathryn laughed and rolled her head back. The strap between her legs was rubbing her clit every time she drew back, and she wrinkled her nose and bit her lip as she tried to build a proper rhythm. She got an idea then and put her feet together for a solid base, then leaned back to give herself a lap. She pulled Eva up, shifting her center of gravity until she was seated on her with the cock holding her in place.

"Ride me," Kathryn said, her voice shaking as she said the two simple words that had such large meaning. She wet her lips as Eva held her gaze and began to rise. Kathryn felt the toy about to fall out and then Eva dropped back into place. Kathryn cried out and leaned forward, burying her face in Eva's cleavage. Eva cupped her back of her head, her thighs tightening around Kathryn for every upward rise and then relaxing when she dropped.

"I'm coming, Kathryn..."

Kathryn squeezed her eyes shut and moved her hips to meet Eva's movements. Eva cried out and ground her hips against Kathryn's, rolling her lower body with the cock deep inside of her, gasping as she sagged against Kathryn for support. Kathryn held her up and kissed whatever skin she could reach as she carefully lowered Eva to the bed and pulled her hips back. The toy slipped free, and Eva cupped a hand over her sensitive sex, bending her knees as she twisted to look at Kathryn.

"How was it?"

"Indescribable."

They were lying on their sides, facing each other, and Kathryn reached up to push the hair out of Eva's face. Eva's eyes drifted sleepily, and Kathryn would have been content to just watch her sleep. She realized with a start that they were in Eva's bed, and she moved just a little closer and whispered that fact in Eva's ear.

"We seem to be. Yes."

"I just wanted... to acknowledge it."

Eva smiled.

Kathryn looked down at the toy. "Do you use this often?"

"Mm-mm, no. That one is new. I bought it just for you."

"You did?"

"It's yours." She kissed the corner of Kathryn's mouth, and Kathryn turned her head to make it a full kiss. Their tongues tangled and Kathryn wrapped her fingers around the shaft. She pulled on it, using the cock as a handle to guide the center strap against her clit. Eva looked down and realized what she was doing. She gently brushed away Kathryn's hand, wrapped her fingers in their place, and began to stroke.

"Want me to jerk you off?"

Kathryn whimpered. "I'm close. Harder."

Eva kissed her face as she stroked. Kathryn rocked her hips in a mockery of what she had just done, opening her eyes to focus on Kathryn's face as she came, trembling in silence for a moment before she gave in and let Eva know. Eva released the cock and pushed two fingers under the harness, pressing them against her as the muscles seemed to vibrate of their own accord. Her legs went rigid when she came, and she dropped her head to Eva's breast.

"I love you," Eva whispered.

Kathryn closed her eyes. "I love you, too. Thank you."

"It's my pleasure. Literally."

"Not for the toy. For everything." She lifted her head and rested it on the pillow, her nose almost brushing Eva's. They were so close that it was hard to focus, but she didn't care. She traced the line of Eva's jaw and let her fingers linger on her lips. "For reminding me I'm a living thing. I have a heartbeat. I can feel... happiness and pleasure." She smiled and kissed Eva, then brushed their noses together. "I get the same thrill hearing your voice as I do when you're kissing me."

"I know how you feel."

Kathryn stared at her for a moment before she brought her hand up. She sucked the third finger of her left hand around her wedding ring and then grimaced as she pulled it off. Eva watched, knowing what she was doing but unwilling to accept it was real. The ring slid off easily once it was past the middle knuckle, and Kathryn lifted Eva's left hand.

"You don't have to do that," Eva said, trying to stop Kathryn from doing something she would regret.

Kathryn slipped the ring onto Eva's finger. "I want to." She bent down and kissed it. "I wish I could put this on you for real."

"You've only known me for five weeks."

"But I know you."

Eva stared at her for a moment and then took off the twisted sterling-silver ring off her thumb and put it on Kathryn's so-recently bared ring finger. 

"This doesn't mean anything," Eva whispered. "But I wish it did."

"Me too."

Eva scooted closer and put her leg over Kathryn's hip. "You said you wanted to sleep with me. Sleep. I'll wake you in a little while."

Kathryn curled against Eva and closed her eyes.

She dreamt of walking down an unfamiliar country road, strolling without exhaustion or destination. Her hands were in her pockets, and everyone she saw on the streets smiled when she passed. Occasionally she would look back to make sure she could see a landmark that would lead her home. The tall tower was obscured by clouds and haze, but she knew she could find her way back home if she needed to. Up ahead the road ended suddenly. There was emptiness, and she knew that crossing into that unknown territory would obscure the landmarks and cast her into confusion. The last thing she remembered from the dream was the sound of her shoes on the pavement as she ran toward the unknown.

#

They parted ways at sundown again, waiting until they were showering together to swap rings again. Eva washed Kathryn's hair, and Kathryn washed Eva's legs and feet. There was something undeniably subservient about it, but with Eva she didn't care. She would kneel for Eva without hesitation because she knew that Eva would kneel for her as well. It was only then that she realized the reason she had been so open with Eva. There was no power struggle. Neither of them was trying to top the other. She looked up at Eva and smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing. I just love you."

Eva reached down and cupped Kathryn's cheek as the shower cascaded down onto them both. "That's a good reason to smile."

Afterward Kathryn dried her hair and watched her face in the mirror as Eva dressed behind her. She tilted her head to the side and narrowed her eyes.

"He has to know."

"Who? Joseph?"

"Look at me. I'm a completely different person than I was five weeks ago. I look alive now. How can he miss that?"

Eva embraced her from behind. "If he wanted to see how much you've changed, he would have to look at you first."

"True." She wet her lips and reached back to stroke her hand over Eva's hip. "Tomorrow? In class?"

Eva pecked Kathryn's cheek. "It's a date, my heart."

Kathryn smiled and looked down at her ring. She could barely stand wearing it now that she knew where it truly belonged. She ran her thumb over the band, covered her left hand with her right, and looked at herself in the mirror. She didn't know who that woman was, not yet, but she already liked her far more than the woman she was used to seeing. She smiled, and the expression looked easy and natural on this woman's face. She bit her bottom lip and chuckled softly, picking up the hairbrush to finish preparing herself for her return to the real world.

PART VI

Kathryn let Eva drive her most of the way home, asking to be dropped off a block away. She kissed Eva goodbye and walked the rest of the way. She got home after dark and heated up a frozen dinner in the microwave. She looked down at her wedding ring as the dinner rotated on its little tray. The years it had spent on her hand didn't hold a candle to the few hours it had been on Eva's. It was Eva's ring now, and Kathryn was just wearing it to keep up appearances. No... she was wearing it to remember those hours when it had been the only thing Eva was wearing. 

Joseph came into the kitchen, looked at the microwave first and then at her. Kathryn put her hands on the counter and waited for him to speak first.

"More pictures, huh?"

"Do you know what the blue hour is? It's that time at dawn and twilight when the sun is at just the right angle to make the sky look like a work of art. It's still bright enough to see, but dark enough that windows are lit up and buildings are shining. That's why I've been out so much at sunset. I want to capture that in my pictures."

"Well, where are you the rest of the time?"

"Developing the pictures. Working on my technique."

He sighed and looked at the microwave again. "And did you forget how to cook?"

She resisted the urge to snap at him. She remembered how powerful she'd felt with a cock between her legs, all those times Joseph had crawled on top of her and pounded her into the bed... suddenly she felt armed to stand against him.

"Maybe I found better ways to spend my time than stand over a stove for three hours making a meal you won't appreciate. This will give you the same amount of sustenance but I don't have to suffer as much for it."

He laughed cruelly. "Oh, yeah, you're _really_ suffering, Kathryn. I can't imagine how hard it must be to sit around taking little pictures all day. You have it so rough, doll. Why don't you go sit on the couch and have some Ben  & Jerrys and I'll be in there to fan you with fucking... ostrich feathers or something."

Kathryn bowed her head and looked at her shoes. The meek side of her, the side that had been cultivated for thirty years, tried to see his point. All the money she had, she'd gotten from him. The clothes on her back, the money to have her hair done, even the photography class... all the expenses came from his paycheck. But goddamn it - this coming from the part of her that earned a voice the moment she kissed Eva - hadn't she earned it back in spades? Keeping up his house, maintaining him for the length of their marriage? When did housewife become a pejorative title? 

"I'm not a child," she said quietly. "And I'm not some lazy whore you keep around so you have something to fuck."

"What is with this language? I didn't marry a damned sailor."

Kathryn bit the inside of her cheek as the microwave beeped. Joseph ignored it. She stepped past him, opened the microwave and took it out. The tray was almost too hot to touch, but she ignored that as she held it out to him.

"Do you want this?"

"I want my wife to cook me dinner. That, that's... reheated shit."

"Fine." She tossed the tray upside down into the sink. "Make yourself a sandwich."

She started past him and he grabbed her arm just above the elbow. "What the hell has gotten into you?"

 _EVA._ "You're hurting me."

He tightened his grip and Kathryn's resolve wavered. She opened her mouth in a silent gasp as his fingers dug in.

"You want to act like the poor put-upon princess? Poor pitiful you?" He twisted and this time a sound squeaked out of Kathryn's throat. She closed her eyes as his fingers tightened. "You're going to stop this staying out all day, acting like a little bitch bullshit right now. I'm your husband, and I provide a pretty fucking good life for you. If you don't respect that, I'll refresh your memory. Got me?"

"Yes." She hated the word as it came out of her mouth, but it caused him to let go of her arm. He looked at the frozen dinner in the sink and then swatted her hard on the ass. She cringed as he pointed at the stove. 

"Dinner. It's already late, so make it good. I'm hungry."

She realized she had nothing to gain by fighting at this point, so she nodded and brushed her hair out of her face. He walked back into the living room, and Kathryn slowly moved to get the pot from the cabinet. As she filled it with water she rolled up the sleeve of her sweater to examine the soft flesh of her upper arm. The spot where Joseph grabbed her was bright red, and she was ashamed to know it would bruise by the next time she saw Eva. How would she explain it? She tugged the sleeve back into place and focused on the dinner.

#

Kathryn ignored what happened behind their closed bedroom door that night. Eva's good works, her tremendous gift, was taken away from her in the space of a few humiliating minutes. In the end, she went to sleep quickly and hoped she could convince herself it had been a dream.

#

She shopped for groceries on Thursday morning, as she always did. Joseph always left for work late on Thursday, so she was able to use his truck to get to the store and back. He was in the living room when she got home and she remained silent as she transferred the groceries from the bags to the freezer. She was nearly done, rearranging the cereal boxes from newest to least-full, when Joseph came into the kitchen.

"I seem to keep finding you in here. And yet, you never seem to be cooking me dinner anymore."

She didn't respond, didn't even offer a fake smile.

"You didn't say hi when you came in."

"Hi." 

He sighed. "I have to tell you, Kathryn, this new attitude of yours? I'm not a fan. I am not a fan of it one bit. I thought you learned your lesson last night."

 _"Tell me you like that, bitch."_ She cringed as his voice echoed in her head. "Sorry. I'm just... sore."

"Well, I get the feeling things are going to be getting back to normal around here real soon. It's just a little rough patch, right? Sweetheart?"

"Right." She didn't know how much longer she could bear to be in the same house as this man. How had she managed for so long? 

"Good. Excellent."

He took a beer from the fridge and left her alone again. She sighed and rubbed her arms as if she'd felt a chill, put aside the grocery bags for recycling, and went into the dining room. She wanted to take some pictures to calm her soul, but the camera bag wasn't by the back door where she'd left it. She looked around in case it had been kicked out of the way, but it was too big to be hidden. She went into the living room and looked at the couch, at her chair. She knew it wasn't in the truck. She knew she hadn't left it in Eva's truck, because she remembered it bumping her hip when she'd walked the remaining distance home.

He sighed. "What's wrong now?"

"I can't find my camera."

"Oh. I gave that to Michael."

It took her a moment to realize what he'd said. "You what?"

"He's leaving on that big trip today. South America? He had this puny little thing, so I said he could take yours."

"Get it back."

"I can't get it back. He's on his way to the airport."

Kathryn's heart pounded. "How could you give away my camera?"

"My camera," he said. "Paid for it. Let you use it. But my friend needed it more. It's South America, Kathryn. I'm sure you've taken a lot of nice pictures of sunsets and birds and shit, but I think Michael can get a little more use out of it than you were."

Her mind was stuck in a loop. "How could you do that to me?"

He finally looked at her, letting the anger fill his expression. "What did I do to you? It was _my_ camera, Kathryn."

"I needed that for my class. There are four weeks left. Eight classes. How am I supposed to participate or do my assignments without a camera?"

"Yeah. About that class... I don't think you should go anymore."

"You don't get to decide that!"

He stood up. "I paid for them, so yeah. I do. I don't like the element you're meeting there. They're changing you into some bitchy little sulky girl I don't know. And the language, my God. In our whole marriage I've heard you cuss maybe twice. Now it's fuck this and bullshit that. I'm sure it's that Gomez or Lopez girl you've been hanging around with. I'm done with it, Kathryn. I want my wife back. So no more camera, no more photography class."

"How dare you."

"What did I do?"

Her eyes were full of tears. "That class... you have no idea what that class meant to me. And you just took it away without even telling me. How could you do something so cruel?"

"I'm just trying to get my wife back."

"I have news for you, Joe. Your wife is dead." She started for the door, but he grabbed her again. The same arm, the same spot, and his fingers dug into the bruise that was already blooming. She cried out, arching away from him like a startled animal, but he didn't let up his grip. "Stop, please, ow... ow."

"This talking-back bullshit is going to stop right now."

She tried to pull her arm away, but she couldn't get free. Her other arm suddenly came up, her hand balled into a fist she didn't remember making, and she hit him in the side of the head. He was so startled that he let her go and stumbled back a step. Kathryn covered her arm, which hurt so badly she thought she might be bleeding, and retreated backwards so she wouldn't have to turn her back on him.

"Don't touch me. Don't touch me ever again, you son of a bitch."

She left the house and considered taking his truck, since she still had the keys, but even in her anger and hurt she couldn't bring herself to do that. She fished the keys out of her pocket and tossed them onto the hood as she followed the driveway down to the sidewalk. Still clutching her hurt arm, her purse still in the house, she started walking.

Eva lived five miles away and, thought Kathryn felt she could have walked that distance, she didn't want to fall into her lover's arms as a sobbing, inconsolable mess. She didn't have the strength to face Eva when her arm was still throbbing where her husband had hurt her. And, to be completely honest with herself, she didn't want to be in Eva's house while she was still sore from Joseph's little retribution-sex the night before. He'd never been so rough with her, had never done... some of the more degrading things he'd done... and her body was still protesting its misuse hours later. 

She walked to the library and wandered the stacks, found a book of classic artwork that she could look at without forcing her mind to process words, and whiled away the day. She never felt hungry for lunch, so when she looked up and saw it was mid-afternoon she was startled. She put the book back where she'd found it and left the library.

She walked to the community center, the muscles in her thighs burning from all the walking she'd done. But a part of her felt like it was waking up and remembering the way things had been before Joe. She was free to do whatever she wanted. She didn't have to worry about dinner or schedules. Walking from place to place took longer, but she could make her own schedule.

She arrived early, taking a seat on the bench where she usually waited for Joe to pick her up. Other people from her class soon started to arrive, and they greeted her kindly. She realized she barely knew any of their names, although she did recognize most of them. How could they be so easily forgotten when Eva had so quickly such an enduring part of her life? She was still pondering the question when Eva's truck appeared and her heart quickened. She stood and waited as Eva crossed the parking lot, smiling the whole way.

"Hey, you."

"Hi."

"Where's your camera?"

"Joseph gave it away." The tears she thought she'd quashed in the library came back now, and she put the back of her hand against her lips to hold back a sob. Eva's face showed her confusion mixed with anger, and she put a hand on Kathryn's shoulder to guide her into the atrium of the community center.

"What do you mean he gave it away?"

Kathryn explained his deluded reasoning, watching as Eva became angrier with every word. When Kathryn said he'd quit paying for the classes, Eva shook her head.

"No, we all paid upfront. Remember? Non-refundable. The last eight classes are paid for. He can't keep you from attending them."

"I think he can."

"No. He can't."

"He _can_." She jerked up the sleeve of her sweater to expose the mottled, ugly bruise spreading above her elbow.

Eva just stared at it, completely still as if the moment had been frozen in time. After ten seconds of absolute stillness and silence, Eva looked into Kathryn's eyes.

"He hurt you."

"I'm fi--"

" _He hurt you._ " It was a hiss, and tears appeared in Eva's eyes. She was suddenly a different person, dark and vengeful. Kathryn had never felt anything but safe with Eva, but suddenly she could see that she had a dark side. Unlike Joseph, she knew that Eva would never turn that dark side on her. This was a power reserved for those who dared hurt the ones Eva cared about. This was a mother lifting a car to protect her child, this was a righteous anger.

An anger that Kathryn dissipated by touching her cheek. 

"I'm going to miss you."

Eva gasped as if she had been pinched. "No. Just because we're losing the class... fuck the class. This isn't about the class anymore, Kathryn."

"It was my only reason for being out of the house so much."

"Then we'll start a book club, or we'll do neighborhood watch. Please, Kathryn. Don't. He took your camera, don't let him take me, too."

Kathryn closed her eyes. "I don't have a choice."

"Oh, my heart." Eva collapsed against her and Kathryn embraced her. 

"My heart," Kathryn whispered into her hair.

They held each other for a long moment, clinging to each other for dear life until finally Kathryn pulled away. She used both hands to push Eva's hair back, then bent down and kissed her lips. It was their first kiss in public, and they both felt the importance of that fact as they pressed against each other. They both decided that the world around them didn't matter as much as the woman right in front of her.

"Where does he think you are right now?"

"I don't know. I don't care."

Eva took her hand. "Come home with me."

"But the class... it's non-refundable." She chuckled as she followed Eva out into the parking lot, half-jogging back to her truck. "Each class costs fifteen dollars."

Eva smiled back at her. "You're worth the expense."

Kathryn climbed into the passenger side of Eva's truck and dropped down the sun visor to check how she looked. Her hair was windswept, but luckily she hadn't put on much makeup that morning. She figured she'd have looked like Alice Cooper if she had. She flattened her fingers on her cheeks and pulled down, trying to erase all the tears she'd shed that day as Eva got behind the wheel and started the engine. She reached out and took Kathryn's hand, and she kissed the back of it before she put the truck in gear and backed out of the spot.

#

"We don't have to do this."

"If you want it later and don't have it, there's no way to go back in time. This way we'll have it if you decide to do something."

They were in her living room. Kathryn was seated on the couch with her sleeve rolled up and her arm held out under the end table's lamp. Eva was hunched over her with the camera to her eyes, and she snapped another picture of the bruise. It was easy to distinctly make out the shape of Joseph's thumb and forefinger on the pale flesh, and Eva felt sickened even as she snapped the third photo. 

"I want evidence of what he did to you, just in case."

Kathryn nodded slowly. "I understand. I just don't see myself doing anything legal about it. I mean, a police report and..." She sighed. "I can't even bring myself to divorce him."

"Did you ever see him hurting you? Did you ever imagine he would leave a bruise like that on your arm?"

Kathryn looked down at the purple and yellow blob. "He fucked me in the ass last night."

"What?"

She shook her head, wishing she hadn't said it. "We had a fight. I emasculated him a little, I guess. So he..." She shrugged. "Never mind."

Eva knelt in front of her. "Kathryn, he raped you."

"He didn't. We're married. He just--"

"He did something you didn't want and he hurt you to get it. What would you call that?"

Kathryn looked at her. "He's my husband."

"Maybe he shouldn't be anymore."

Kathryn closed her eyes and Eva touched her cheek. She was about to say something else when someone pounded on the front door so suddenly that she jumped. Kathryn frowned.

"Everyone knows I have class right now," she muttered. She stood and went to the door, peeking through the window to see who it was. "Oh, fuck."

"What? Who is it?"

"It's Joe."

Kathryn shot to her feet, her heart feeling paralyzed in her chest. Eva stepped back from the door and took out her phone. She held it in her hand as she spoke.

"Mr. Tramonto, I don't want you on my property."

"You have my wife in there. I'm not leaving without her."

"How did you find her here?"

"I drove to that damn community center to apologize. I knew she'd go there for her damn class. I bought her a new fucking camera. And then I saw her _kissing you_." He pounded the flat of his hand against the door so hard that both women jumped. "How long have you been _fucking my wife_?"

Kathryn took out her phone and stared at the screen. 911, three little numbers. Joseph shouted a horrible, ugly word at the door, and then the pounding stopped. 

"Is he leaving?"

"He's pacing around on the porch." She turned and saw the phone in Kathryn's hand. "Did you call 911?"

"No. I... should I? Of course I should..."

The door suddenly slammed open, the jam splintering and showering Eva's back with broken shards of wood. She ducked and covered her head as Joseph came inside. He was holding a hammer, most likely retrieved from the back of his truck, and he dropped it as he stepped over the threshold. Eva spun to face him and he backhanded her. She hit the wall and slid down, lips parted in shock and pain as she dropped on her butt.

Joseph stepped over her and walked toward Kathryn. She was so terrified that she dropped the phone and began to back away from him.

"Joe... please."

"Gonna say it didn't mean anything? Huh? You fucking lesbian bitch..."

"Just let her go. Let her go..."

He ignored her and grabbed her arm, thankfully well away from the bruise. He twisted and she dropped to her knees, eyes closed as he loomed over her. "Everything I've given you, and this is how you repay me?" He stepped closer, still holding her arm as he closed his other hand around her throat. "I buy your food, your clothes, your makeup, everything. Maybe I ought to make you earn your air, too. Is that it? I don't give you enough? Well, how about breathing, bitch?" His hand tightened and Kathryn struggled for air.

Eva's voice filled the air, a primal cry of rage, and Joseph suddenly went stiff. His hands flexed and she twisted away from him, hitting her ass and scurrying away on her hands and knees like a crab. Joe slumped to the ground to reveal Eva standing behind him, chest heaving, eyes wide with disbelief. She was holding the hammer Joseph had brought in and a streak of red was splattered across the front of her shirt.

"What did you do," Kathryn gasped.

Eva looked at her. "He was going to kill you."

"He was going to kill _you_ ," Kathryn said. "Are you okay?"

Eva managed to nod.

Kathryn looked at her husband's body. "Is he..."

"I don't know." She looked at the hammer and then tossed it. Suddenly she heard sirens and jumped. One of the neighbors must have heard the shouting and called the police. Suddenly panicked, she said, "We have to go."

"Go?" Kathryn got to her feet. "What..."

Eva grabbed her hand. "We have to leave before the police get here. This is Texas, my heart." Kathryn's head swam from the casual way Eva dropped the endearment, as if it was second-nature, but it was already swimming from the situation. "They're going to walk in and see this and they're going to sensationalize it. Lesbian Kills Lover's Husband in Jealous Rage. Honey, if we ever want to be together again, we have to go."

Kathryn considered the possibility for a moment. Just going, jumping into Eva's truck and driving away into the sunset. East to Louisiana, north to Oklahoma, west to New Mexico... it had to be a possibility. Just driving to a new life where no one knew either of them. Escaping into a world where she didn't have to label herself as anything other than Eva's lover. Eva would grow her hair out and straighten it; she bet it would make her look Hispanic if she did, and she was intrigued by the idea. And she could completely change her own look. Cut her hair... cut it extremely short. Joseph liked long hair so she kept it to the middle of her back, but now she could cut it all off. Wear it in a man's style, color it blonde. 

She saw them, these two strangers, pulling up outside a gas station a hundred or two hundred miles away from home, getting something microwavable to eat, using the bathroom, refilling the tank and then finding the highway again. Sleeping in motels, making love without worrying about when she was expected to be home.

In her mind, in this brief fantasy that took all of two seconds to unfold, they ended up somewhere cold. Maine or the Pacific Northwest, a quiet island where everyone knew everyone else but minded their own business. She saw Eva at her age, a little gray at the temples with laugh lines around her mouth. She could see it so clearly, Eva at the window with the ocean outside, smiling when she saw Kathryn coming into the house.

The sirens were coming closer, and the blood was pooling around Joseph's head so much faster than she would have believed possible. She felt nauseated at the sight but forced the urge down, squeezing Eva's hand.

"I made Joseph give up his future. I won't let you give up your present."

Eva's face fell, but the tension faded from her body. She stepped closer and kissed Kathryn as if it was the last time, both of them knowing it very well could be. They had stepped apart before the police came through the broken door, and Eva put her hands over her head with the fingers spread. "I'm the one who hit him. It was me. I had to protect Kathryn from him."

A few of the cops moved down the hall to make sure the rest of the house was secure, and the one in the lead looked at the body before he holstered his weapon and stepped into the living room. He stared at Eva for a moment. "Ava?"

"Eva," she corrected. "Eva Alvarez. I work with the crime scene unit."

"I thought I recognized you." He looked at the body again, then at Kathryn. She was rubbing her throat with her hand, her sleeve still rolled up to show the day-old bruise above her elbow. He looked at Joseph and then finally back to Eva as if he'd just realized she was there. "Put your hands down, Ms. Alvarez."

She hesitated, but then did as he said.


	6. Epilogue

They were taken to the police station in a detective's car, not handcuffed or separated but sitting in the backseat. There is an undeniable symbolism to being put in the backseat of a police car, even one that was unmarked. When they arrived they were taken to separate rooms to tell their stories. Kathryn simply told the truth, omitting anything sexual. She and Eva were friends who bonded over a mutual love of photography. Joseph became jealous of the time they spent together. They had argued, the arguments got worse, and then she'd retreated to Eva as a safe haven. He followed her and broke down her door. He attacked Eva, then attacked Kathryn, and Eva had done what she had to do.

Her throat was starting to hurt too much to speak by the time she was finished, something that only supported her truth. A police photographer - one of Eva's coworkers most likely - came into the room and took pictures of the bruise on her arm and the fresh marks on her throat. When she was alone with the female detective she quietly and nervously asked about the possibility of a rape exam. She was still hurting from the night before and she was starting to worry she'd been really injured. The detective agreed to set it up.

Kathryn went to the hospital and, when she was brought back to the station, a new charge was added to the sheet. Even if he'd never go to trial, she was glad that it would be official and filed away so her mind could never tell her she'd just blown things out of proportion. Her husband ha raped her. She shuddered at the thought and forced it into the back of her mind. It was the past. It was over and done with.

She found out from the detective that her story matched Eva's well enough that they were satisfied, and both stories meshed with what the neighbors had reported when they called 911. Eva had struck out not only to protect her friend, but in defense of her property. Joseph had been an intruder and Eva had every right to use whatever force she deemed necessary on him. The fact she'd done it with a weapon he brought onto the premises himself helped her cause.

By morning they were cleared of all charges. Eva used necessary force to defend her home, an assertion supported by the fact she'd only struck him once. Kathryn had been in imminent danger and Eva did what was necessary. The morning paper was even going so far as to call her a hero for what she did. 

They couldn't go back to Eva's house since it was a crime scene, and neither of them wanted to go back to the house Kathryn had shared with Joseph. Eva got them a hotel room, and they checked in a little after noon. Kathryn was exhausted from being up for nearly two days straight, and Eva tucked her into bed. She was asleep almost before the blanket was lifted to her shoulders.

When she woke, Eva was spooning her from behind. "Are you awake?" she whispered.

"Yeah."

Kathryn rolled to face her. She put her hand on Eva's face. Eva smiled and stroked Kathryn's hip. Kathryn pictured the future again. She saw herself, perhaps still with short blonde hair, coming out of Eva's darkroom. And Eva, with her curly hair pinned back, raising her head to look at the picture Kathryn had to show her. They conferred about it, whether or not the light was good enough for the newspaper. Ah, yes, in her fantasy she was a freelance photographer for the local paper. Popular, too. And in her fantasy Eva declared the photo a winner, and Kathryn paid for the critique with a kiss.

She noticed the light on Eva's face and looked over her shoulder at the window. "It's sunset," she whispered.

"Yes, it is." She tightened her grip on Kathryn's hands. "Do you have to go?"

Kathryn faced her again and smiled. "Not this time. Not ever again." 

Eva smiled and kissed her lover, and Kathryn pressed closer to her.

The sun passed the horizon and the day ended with Kathryn in Eva's arms, and she knew in her soul that things were exactly as they were meant to be.


End file.
